First of all, apologies for not posting anything today. I'm afraid I have been nearer a microphone than to a computer all day. Can't think why. My views on the latest twist in the LibDem leadership contest will appear later on. Be sure and tune in to Question Time tonight. I understand it features Simon Hughes and Ann Widdecombe. Can't wait.
In the meantime, I have just received PopBitch's weekly email in which they say that happy slapping is a thing of the past and the new craze among schoolkids is Seagulling. As the News of the World might say, this is a practice too revolting for a family blog to describe. But feel free to speculate on what it might entail in the Comments section. I might even award a prize to the most entertaining one...
PS 22.15 Bugger, Widders has been replaced by Redwood.
Hughes and Widdecombe, I can feel the sexual tension already.
Promises to be a blinder.
I was of the understanding that John Redwood is on QT tonight.
Seagulling: By chance it is in anyway similar to what a certain Mark Oaten is supposed to have paid (and enjoyed) certain individuals doing unto him... but from a greater height?
Question Time should be interesting.
It entails the young tykes ejaculating into their dirty mitts then throwing their emission onto a hapless classmate and shouting 'Seagull'. What's wrong with skipping or football?
You want me to tell you what seagulling is?
Do you know if Harry is on the boat?
It’s the schoolboy practice of rushing out of a lesson and then boring the shit out of the juniors by quoting Chekhov at them…
Typical public school stuff. Disgusting. What’s wrong with a bit of Chaucer?
When dogging, one defecates on to the windscreen of the car that the couple are having sex in.
Or so says the 'Urban Dictionary'.
It's obvious isn't it? Seagulling is where you creep up quietly behind your unsuspecting victim with a megablaster (portable-radio) turned on at full blast, and then press the play button and unleash the eightes synthpop classic 'I Ran' by A Flock Of Seagulls.
Seagulling: Originally a 'Seagull' was someone who resembled Ken Livingstone (derived from the book by Richard Bach Jonathan Livingston Seagull). The extended form of 'Seagulling' has come to refer to the rather infantile practical joke, played when visiting friends or relations, of placing a live newt in their bath.
On a programme called 'Celebrity Big Brother's Big Mouth' Uri Geller was mildly condemning Mr Galloway for his performance in the BB house. Mr Galloway was also a panel guest on aforementioned programme. Upon hearing Mr Geller's remarks, Mr Galloway said 'is this because you are an Israeli?' there was an audible intake of breath from the audience.
You bugger Widders if you want mate... but it'll be bound to be in the 'Screws' if you do, so you may as well come clean.... (in the nicest possible sense).
Post a Comment