What do David Cameron, Ming Campbell and I have in common?
[prepares himself for an onslaught]
UPDATE:Some hilarious suggestions so far - some even true, but not the one I'm looking for.
UPDATE Thur 9am: Daily Referendum got closest. The answer is that David Cameron, Ming Campbell and I all go to the same dental practice. You really did come up with some hilarious answers though. And some highly insulting ones too!
Are you all gay?
They have a cat in hells chance of ever becoming the Prime Minister
The second letter of your surname is "a".
What's my prize?
You all have "A" as the second letter in your surname.
You've all got Scottish names, at least in part.
(1) You are all Prospective Parliamentary Candidates at the next general election.
(2) You are all members of the same Clan.
You're all classed as Scots by the English Democrats?
You've all got surnames that can be used as first names, ie Cameron Diaz, Campbell Brown and Dale Winton,
You're all losers?
You lost at the last election
Ming has lost the confidence of a large number of his party
Cameron will lose the next election because he is a fool.
Some, er interesting suggestions so far. No one is anywhere near though.
Apart from the last comment, natch.
You are all 6'2"
Your initials are also acronyms.
Or are you all types of soup?
You all think Normo Tebbs is a right &£%#
Could it be that none of you passed the 11+ ?
You all hate Thatcher?
The press caught one looking at a toilet, and think the other's career is going down one?
You were all born in the same month?
You're all Liberal Democrats?
Foot and Mouth?
Foot in Mouth???
Oh, and anonymous? About this one testicle thing?
Is that each or between the three?
Are you suggesting that there's something rather Greek and mythological going on here that we don't know about?
You're all in the list of the Top 500 political bloggers in the UK?
You are all gonna be at the Tory Conference!
So am I BTW!
Looking forward to making your acquaintance Mr Dale.
Mrs Dale's Diary?
I don't know, but Winnie the Pooh and William the Conqueror have the same middle name. Do I get a consolation prize?
Iain Campbell Dale --> Ming Campbell --> Er...
You all have big foreheads?
You've all written articles in the Telegraph?
You all think that Labour will win the next election?
Receding Hair Lines
You all three failed to become MPs at your first attempt?
Is it something to do with Norfolk North?
The Libdems won it
You lost it
And David Cameron declined the opportunity to stand as PPC.
One is old enough to draw his old age pension and the other two should?
Crikey Iain, I didn't realise you're about to lose your job as well.
I'll raise that 'one testicle' remark.
Nothing, absolutely nothing at all....
Be profoundly grateful for that.
I'm a regular reader of this blog. And an optimist.
They both believe they have age on their side.
All out of touch ivory tower dwellers?
All doomed to die in well-deserved obscurity.
A desire for world domination and the complete subjugation of the weak and pathetic masses...
Ah, Ming Campbell - sorry, I misread that as Ming the Merciless...
In that case my answer is only two thirds correct.
Guilty memories of the same awful debauched night.
Are the three of you going to find a gun and go tebbit hunting, you may have to gets cycles as Tebbit knows how to get on his bike
you owned a book shop ,maybe your going to sell mingies a book by our Dave on how to stay in parliment and get to be PM by giving up greens.
None of you would use a toilet cubical after Gordon Brown?
You are all closet socialists ?
You are all bloggers (although Ming gets one of his "young turks" to do the interweb thingy)
You are all liberals..
Ming in the Liberal Democrats
Cameron is a 'liberal' conservative.
Iain is a 'liberal' in the yankee sense of being someone who doesn't blow a fuse when someone mentions 'gay marriage' or 'embryo research' and would consider living in San Francisco, if it wasn't for the threat of those pesky earthquakes..
All are left handed.
You have the same middle names ?
None of you are quite well known enough to appear on "I'm a celebrity, get me out of here !"
You are all 'sons of the manse' ?
You were all raised by stay-at-home mothers ?
You all had scholarships to schools you couldn't otherwise have afforded [apart from David Cameron..]
You've all got the middle name Harry ?
You were all Head Boy/Prefect at school ??
You have all enjoyed fagging in the past ?
I think what you all have in common is..
You've all 'had' Mariella Frostrup..
Mariella Frostrup has 'had' all of you, in a manner of speaking..
You've all got Blue Peter badges ?
You've all got Audis ?
You've all got terriers as pets ?
You all failed to win a seat first time round. But despite that, you're all destined for eventual glory. Apart from Cameron.
Oh, and you're all rather nice. But Ming is probably the only one who is happy with this situation.
You're all opposed to ID cards?
You're all closet liberals.
I don't know what happened to my winning answer which I posted, but all three of you failed to win your first seats as MPS.
Dizzy: I thought of that but I could only find 2 out of the 3 with a Campbell connection.
OMG, /natch?!!! You are so GAY!
I think the answer is:
You're all a bit thick...in the trouser department.
Now, do I get a go on it?
You all have ancestral roots in the same part of Scotland?
Both are under attack from our "independent" media.
I know! I know! I think I know! You've all got Jack Russells! ??
Ah, Verity is ahead of me ! I think I said Terriers - not the same thing at all !
Go on, give her the t-shirt NOW !!!!
righty-ho - I'm bored now - tell all or I'm off to Guido for the evening..
This 'quick quiz' was posted about eighteen hours ago.
If we were going to win something we might hang on; so either give a few clues or we're going to bugger off down the pub...
You all go to the same optician.
Your all members of the same golf club or you all have the same handicap.
You all started off in PR
Wear the same ties.
Go to the same Tailor.
They got married abroad and you are going to have a civil wedding abroad. Do I need to buy a hat?
Born in India?
You are all boxers and not briefs.
Pathetic, I know.
Is it a receding hair question?
All refuse to be a member of a certain club because they don't allow women in.
All joining the Labour party?
(below the belt I know)
None of you read my blog?
You all have a partner with a tatoo.
You all did the Atkins diet (but it only worked in Ming's case)
You all grew up on a farm.
You all happen to have the same nickname: Bing Crosby's Stunt Double?
Neither of them can take advantage of the failures of Labour.
The first question for the Conservatives is when will they get rid of Cameron.
The second is who will take his place and actually represent the conservatives amongst us.
As for Brown attracting those that voted for Thatcher, how risible.
losing your hair- though for different reasons- tupping, ageing, and cursing (your own party)
You all think "British" Gordon is a humourless awkward British student politico who has screwed the British economy and is going to get found out by the British electorate (did I say Brtish yet?) before the next election.
You all wear speedoes!
You're all on Mogadon
Verity, "all got Jack Russells"?
How many of us are lucky enough to have cloned ex-England wicketkeepers captive in the basement?
You all fancy Oona King
You've all been spanked by Lady Elspeth
you have all had unexplained bladder infections?
You're all Jewish?
You're all very good swimmers.
No, scrap that. You're all members of the Magic Circle.
Wait, hold you hard. You don't have kids.
Does Cameron have kids?
Someone get me a researcher. NOW!
God this is getting dull.
You suffer from sleep apnoea?
You are all green reptilian aliens and helped kill Princess Diana, or so David Icke said.
You all want Boris to be the Tory candidate for London Mayor
You're all freemasons?
You are all ex-Olympic 100metre champions?
You all have "innies"?
You all have had affairs with Anne Widdecombe?
You're all love rats?
Was it you three that vandalised the Blue Peter garden ?
all sold their gas guzzler cars to go green?
You'd all hug JHL
1. All Scots
2. All vasectomised
3. All own dogs
4. Not cats
5. Mothers called Dorothy
6. Fathers called Donald
7. That's quite enough now
Menzies Campbell was the loser in three seats. David Cameron was the loser in one seat and Iain Dale was the loser in one seat. You have all been defeated on the Election Battleground.
Alternatively, you all have Scottish ancestry.
Probably you have all been signed up for a re-run of a very old comedy sketch.
David Cameron (standing on a table) - I went to Eton. I am a descendant of William IV and Mrs Jordan. My father in law is a baronet. I am upper class. I look down on him. Looks at Sir Menzies Campbell.
Sir Menzies Campbell (standing on a soapbox) - I went to Glasgow University. I am a Queens Counsel (senior barrister). I married a Major-General's daughter. I am middle class. I look down on him. Looks at Iain Dale.
Iain Dale (slouched on Doughty Street sofa) - I am a blogger. I support "The Hammers". I love Margaret Thatcher. I am an "Essex Boy". I am working class. I look up to them (well, the upper class one at least).
You all drive Audis'?
If that was a quick quiz question, I would hate to see one of your long, slow ones...
Be sure that you all three update your wikipedia entries to reflect this startling relevation...
Did you know Iain that a Menzies Campbell - the only one with much going for him on eBay - was a Professor of Dentistry in Bonny Scotland? Edinburgh I believe. So it's not right about the vasectomy? The link to the eBay item has now gone, alas, but another copy is available here. Open wide.
Could it be that none of your country estates has mains drainage?
Is this a subtle reminder of Gorgon's 'private' dental work ??
Perhaps you should switch to his dentist !
Pull the other one Iain. You really expect us to believe that Ming Campbell has his own teeth?
Over a hundred posts. It proves your readers love quizzes - or just finding new ways to insult you!
That's weird, I would have thought that Ming's teeth would have all fallen out by his age?
David Cameron, Ming Campbell and I all go to the same dental practice.
I could just kick myself for not having thought of that.
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