Monday, August 10, 2009

Back at the Helm

So, have you missed me? I see from the comments on the last thread that one or two of you doubted I could withstand temptation and stay away from the keyboard for four days. Oh ye of little faith. Seeing as the Wifi in the hotel didn't work, it was easier than expected. I shall be doing it again later in the month.

The weather in North Norfolk was superb. It was good to see some old friends and revisit old haunts, although it was sad to see what the new owners have done to my old cottage in Swanton Abbott. They've added a two storey extention on the back, which has ruined it. I had always harboured hopes of buying it back one day. Not any longer.

Anyway, back to work today and going through the manuscript of Mark Oaten's book, Screwing Up, which we're publishing next month. And, of course, preparing for my "speed awareness course" on Thursday...


Anonymous said...

He's Back

Alan Douglas said...

Iain, have they told you yet that the final part of the speed awareness course is that you trade your Audi for a Trabant ?

That, and nothing else, will convince the authorities that you have broken your addiction !

Alan Douglas

Letters From A Tory said...

My girlfriend just did her speed awareness course after doing a staggering 35mph in a 30mph zone, let me know if you want some survival tips!

Gonzalez said...

I am going on a speed awareness course. I need to be a bit more aware of how much I should take when I am burning the midnight oil.

Anonymous said...

The Blakeney Hotel?

Gary Elsby stoke said...

Nice to see you back Iain.

I've missed not reading any denials you would have written about the economic recovery.

Shouldn't you now break the news to Dave that he can't rely on any Labour economic 'catastrophe' for a 2010 General Election victory?

For some reason,best known only to CCHQ and your good self, you refuse to scribe any good news for the economy?

'Most new car sales since....."

"PMI risen for the first time since...."

"The Times economic writers buoyant because......"

"Stock market bouncing because of.."

"Pound rising fast because of..."

You get the picture, Iain?

Next time you're on SKY NEWS, be a devil, do a Portillo and say what you see as the truth and observe the Portillo viewer respect factor kick in for you.

Not to worry too much though, the IMF is stil rooting for the Tories and their catastrophic theory even if the Tory broadsheets reject that analysis.

Rob said...

Don't take any sharp objects with you to the speed awareness course as ritual suicide will be far too tempting in those circumstances.

Anonymous said...

"Anyway, back to work today and going through the manuscript of Mark Oaten's book, Screwing Up.."

Please tell me this is a joke ? I was waiting for one of your boom-tish momments..

"What I did in my Iain Dale Blogging Break [TM}.." I went to the Bristol Balloon Fiesta, which was lucky in getting a complete absence of rain for the whole long weekend.

I shan't bore you all about it now, but the arrival of the Red Arrows did almost bring a tear to one's eye and make one glad to be British... It appears to be one of the few things which still really work after over 10 years of Labour in power which Gordon Brown hasn't yet been able to screw up.

And the fact that an estimated 400,000 people turned up on the Saturday suggests that many share a positive view of our 'brave boys and girls' in the armed forces no matter what the Government thinks.

Anonymous said...

Lovely `sticker` on a Lada Estate car in a Waitrose carpark and your speed awareness course.

"Built for Siberia -Not Suburbia"


Anonymous said...

So, have you missed me?

No, but if you buy me a Twix, I'll pretend.

Anonymous said...

He's back.....but is he Back in Denim?

Enquiring minds want to know...

brian in the tamar valley said...

Welcome back Iain! Interesting comment about your former cottage. Sadly there are people who buy interesting properties and then ruin them because they have absolutely zero appreciation of aesthetics.

The same can be said for some country pubs I'm afraid.

Alex said...

Didn't notice you had been away.

Still I shall enjoy reading why Oaten stood for the Lib Dem leadership, which caused all his problems.

I hope he says it was he was inundated with emails & letters of support. I sent enough of the darn things under various aliases hoping to ensure that there would be a costly leadership election for the Lib Dems. Oaten even nicked some of my text (unattributed) when he launched his campaign.

Oscar From Surbiton said...

Iain, are you listening to Ann on LBC? Don't think the buffoon producer will let me on but she is talking about a python which has eaten a neighbour's cat and I wanted to call up and say that we should encourage more of this. If people keep flea-bag cats as pets and they eat lots of beautiful birds (our bird population has been drastically reduced in recent years) then we should restore the balance of nature by keeping animals which eat cats. Mmmm.. sooo yummy!

Augustus Eldridge said...

It was a very good weekend in North Norfolk.

North Norfolk's Conservative PPC Trevor Ivory and Norman Lamb MP were in the stocks at Walcott on Sunday raising money for Walcott floodsirens.

Anonymous said...

"extention" ??

Gary Elsby - I'm sure Iain can find as many selective quotations as you to show that, at best, we are near the end of the beginning. I think you're running in the wrong race.

Unsworth said...

'Speed Awareness'. Anything to do with recreational chemicals?

Anyway, you know the form. Resist the urge to put the condescending bastards straight on a few issues, be a moron for the day, and walk away.

Thats News said...

It looks bleak for Brown and co! And Hilary Benn expects parents to play 'food poisoning roulette' with the lives of their children

And welcome back.

I tried using my Blackberry to do a spot of uploading to Blogger. It didn't work!

Anonymous said...

Oh goody, a Mark Oaten book, just what the world is waiting for. NOT.

Anonymous said...

The chipmunk is not driving anywhere fast at the moment.

Just sit through the course and say nothing and pay the cheque - then drive off.

Osama the Nazarene said...

Glad you're back as we have to prepare for charges to read the press on the Internet.

Did you hear about Mandelson's plan for universities to accept students of a certain background with lower A level grades?

Reminds me of how in Communist Poland the party apparatchicks had to purchase the odd hectare of land so that they could say that their offspring was of peasant stock. Peasant's kids received bonus points to get into university.

Socialists never change!

Gary Elsby stoke said...

Anonymous: selective quotes?

I selected them from the Tory press.

If I select them from 'the' Labour sympathy press (non plural) we may need to start rounding up Tories everywhere as potential ememies of the State!

It is YOUR press, the TELEGRAPH PRESS etc..etc..that runs these stories!
If we read the Dave stories, we see bankruptcies and meltdowns and a first never end to a recession!

Rubbish, isn't it.

Every day sees another end to the reccession. Day by day, drip by drip.

And the Tories winning manifesto pledge is.....?

A 10% cut.

The middle ground, the dodgy marginal, the floating voter is jumping for joy at the prospect of a 10% cut because we all collectivelly want to 'balance the books' the Tory way?

It's a Portillo nope from me.

Dimoto said...

I wonder if Iain managed to take in the Canaries-Colchester game ...

Mirtha Tidville said...

Speed awareness courses...aah yes good old generosity by Zanu...we dont want to put points on yer licence, they claim, so they pretend to be nice to the peeps and invent things like this...It has a two fold purpose, of course..First it employs more public sector workers and raises more dosh than an actual speeding ticket........

How Liebour

David Logan said...

Gary Elsby stoke is in dreamland. There is a simple explanation for the 'economic indicators' he lists.
They are short term fixes for Browns chronic economic mismanagement designed to buy a few months grace before an election.

Bought with 25 years or more of debt on our children. CCHQ are not running it, they are laughing at it.

Gary Elsby stoke said...

In Tory dreamland, new car sales aren't going through the roof.
Car sales are collapsing.

New car sales means more new cars and more new cars means more building of new cars.

Instead of foreclosing banks(don't call us, George!)those very same banks dole out money everywhere to help those sales....

Meanwhile in Socialist Great Britain (thanks Gordon) the reccession comes to an end.

Because you don't know (neither does Dave and George) the reccession ended at the end of June.

We are now in the phoney reccession, so liked by would be Prime Ministers.

We now have growth and both punch and judy, like this comfort zone of unreality.

If you clock it up, Dave hangs his ambition on an overzealous TELEGRAPH (independent!) poll that has him installed now by a mile and a half, a reccession so bad that only Gideon can solve and a European group that Adolph would decline to join as being too extreme.

You reckon it's in the bag but the only bag is full of nerves.

Portillo will say differently at the run in, always does.
The gap will close to nought from February 2010 and frayed nerves will be allayed (by you) as your party slips back quietly into obscurity and anti Europeanism (they always have do).

Anonymous said...

Mr Elesby -

"UK risks a Japan-style lost decade, BoE will warn"

"Sorry - the house price crash isn't over yet"

"The banks are squeezing small businesses and nobody seems to care "

All from the Telegraph.

For good measure the Guardian says
"Public sector cuts could lead second wave of jobs crisis"

Whilst the Indy has
"New fears over the rising tide of jobless"
"Does the Bank of England know something the rest of us don't - They can prevent the worst economic outcomes. They cannot create the best"

Headlines do not count for much when we will be adding nearly (perhaps more than) £200 billion to the National Debt - and thats this this year. We can expect the same again next year. All just coming from Darlings official figures.

Martin S said...

Car sales have gone through the roof, have they, Gary?

YOU, sir, are a damnable little liar.

Gone through the roof? The actual figures from the industry are as follows:

modest rise in car sales figures

There's a 2.4% increase.

UP 2.4%? Through the roof? Do stop lying, Gary. There's a good chap.

gary Elsby said...

But Gideon talks of Britain in crisis!

He talks of Brown's incompetences!

He talks of bankruptcy Britain!

He talks of debts debts debts!

He talks of a second coming!

He talks of himself-the saviour!


We talk of the end of recession!

We talk positive!

We talk of the £ rising!

You talk of freefall!

Tsk tsk...when will you learn?

and yes, the national debt will have to be corrected and yes, it is best that you don't invest in fiited carpets for your castles and stateley homes! And you lot on post £150K be afraid, be very afraid!

Horny handed son of toil said...

Mr Elsby,

You talk of the end of the recession AND I HEAR SPIN.


You talk of the £ rising AND I HEAR SPECULATION.

Then I look to an impartial commentator and I see what a mess your party has created in this country,