Tuesday, July 04, 2006

John Prescott: An Unreserved Apology

Yesterday I wrote a story headlined GUIDO REVEALS IDENTITY OF SECOND PRESCOTT MISTRESS. This was in addition to his affair with Ms Tracey Temple. I wish to apologise unreservedly to Mr Prescott for any embarrassment this article might have caused him.

It is of course Mr Prescott's third extra marital affair, not his second. I apologise also to the Mail on Sunday who carried an interview with the lady in question, Ms Sarah Bissett-Scott some weeks ago.

I am deeply regretful for any apparent insinuation on my part that Mr Prescott had only two affairs, when I now know his libido was big enough to cope with three.

I trust this clears things up and will be the end of the matter.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Very good!

So that's three... any more?

Reckon he'll be off this time.

nadders said...

On that subject, Guido has gone all Nick Robinson on us and made no comments today.

Has he been extraordinarily redited to somewhere in Europe for revealing too many secrets?

Pulsar said...

Any advance on three?

Anonymous said...

I've shagged him so it must be at least four. This was before my gastric stapling surgery, and during a particularly vulnerable period in my life. I now know it was just a cry for help.

Anonymous said...

Elegantly done, my dear chap.

Ornette said...

Not brave enough to name all three?

WmByrd said...

Only three???

BTW, on an entirely unrelated matter, and simply out of idle curiosity, who is actually the First Secretary of the UK Embassy in Beijing? (Can't find it on the Embassy website).

Anonymous said...

Iain

Sure you know already, but you and Guido gave the Standard "West End Final" its front page story re: mistresses and the whole Anschutz affair

Blogosphere now dictating not only the news agenda, but the front pages... the times they are a changin'

Anonymous said...

I don't know if it's true but rumour has it that they're going to use Pressie as a set of wickets at Lords this summer!

Anonymous said...

I don't know about the first secretary in Beijing, but what about Ms Aine Sheehan as an ex-diary secretary. (http://unfccc.int/cop6/lopcop6.pdf page 47)

Of course, being a diary secretary could be an entirely innocent profession, involving managing Prescott's diary.

Francis Walsingham said...

Anyone could make an FOI request on the FCO and obtain a list of names of staff holding the rank of first secretary.

Personal info is an exception to the requirement to give disclosure under the FOI, but the Info Commissioner's guidance is that names of employees should be released.

I am rather tempted to do this. It would be a short hop skip and jump from there to know who it was.

Anonymous said...

What is it about New Labour and Scotts?

About a week or two before his first affair became public, he was filling in on PMQs for Blair and he actually had the cheek to stand up and say he had never benefitted from being an MP. Oh, yeah!?

Coincidentally -

I heard Prescott Towers in Hull was once a home for fallen women (allegedly). Wonder what attracted to that particular house?

Kevin Davis said...

You had me worried but you appear to have stirred things up in the ES tonight.

Anonymous said...

Vienna Woods, above

"I don't know if it's true but rumour has it that they're going to use Pressie as a set of wickets at Lords this summer!"

Would that be two stumps and a bail?

Peter from Putney said...

Iain, correct me if I'm wrong, but you've been very careful not to name names as regards the Prezza rumours.If, therefore the reference in tonight's Evening Standard that "The allegations were repeated on another website run by a former Conservative candidate" relates to your goodself, no doubt you will be instructing solicitors in the morning!

Anonymous said...

This is from Guido's blog:

Google, from the Oriel College website, comes up with

"Nicola Willey
Geography 1993-6. Since graduating, has been in the fast stream Civil Service. Her current post since January 2000 has been as Private Secretary to the Deputy Prime Minister."

She was in 2005 (and still is, I think) a First Secretary in Beijing.

phone cam foolery said...

Fatboy has no chance of suing anybody, tonight we find out that he has "Discussed William Wilberforce" several times with mr Anshutz, could this be the birth of a new euphemism?

Anonymous said...

wmbyrd

There are several First Secretaries in the Beijing Embassy. The lady in question, First Sec for Environmental Matters, Guido is informed (see his site for the name), spurned the Great Man's advances and complained. It sounds as though she was shipped out to keep her out of the way of prying hacks.

Pulsar said...

Should we not be preparing for multi shags departure to the House of Lords and an appropriate title-Dome & Wilberforce are musts for inclusion!Any other suggestions?

kingbongo said...

Pulsar - I don't think the name of that great tory William Wilberforce should ever be mentioned in the same sentence as Chipolata

Pulsar said...

Bongo-agreed!
Can we come up with another method of recording the "reason" for his visit to the american DOME man?
Casinos cannot be mentioned since they were never discussed!!!!!!!!!!!!

neil craig said...

Who cares. Look Prescott, along with the rest of the cabinet are guilty of genocide, ethnic cleansing & the kidnap, rape & sale of thousands of schoolchildren (granted the Tories & LDs enthusiasticly supported it).

What exactly makes that OK & consensual sex with an adult human of the opposite gender something to get het up about?

dearieme said...

In yer actual Italian, I was told once, "casino" with emphasis on one syllable means gambling den, but with the emphasis on another syllable means brothel. Careful, chaps.

Anonymous said...

Neil Craig said: Who cares. Look Prescott, along with the rest of the cabinet are guilty of genocide, etc.

Yes, Neil, exactly. That's precisely what I have against them. And whatever hurts Prescott and hurts Blair is fine by me. Even if it's only a matter of "consensual sex" Anything will do.