Thursday, January 24, 2008

Jacqui Smith IS Donald Rumsfeld

From Jacqui Smith's interview on Today about 42 days detention.
"It won’t be hypothetical if and when it occurs. We are not legislating now on
the basis that we are bringing it in now for something that might happen in the
future; we are bringing it in now for something that might happen in the future;
we are bringing in a position for if it becomes unhypothetical. If,
unfortunately I and many other experts are right and we do need it in the future
it is in place."

As Shane Greer & LibDem Voice say, it's like listening to Donald Rumsfeld's 'known unknowns'. Except that kinda made sense. The more I see of the lovely Miss Smith the more I want to rearrange the following words.

Depth. Of. Her. Out.

31 comments:

I'm a rule breaker not a law breaker said...

Governent of the talents...Not!

Anonymous said...

"Depth. Of. Her. Out."

Aren't they all?

fnusnuank said...

Iain,

Slaughtering rabbits should be beyond you.

archroy said...

Rumsfeld actually left out the most important bit: the unknown knowns. These are the things we know but don't know we know, and pay consultants hundreds of thousands of pounds to tell us.

Rush-is-Right said...

like listening to Donald Rumsfeld's 'known unknowns'. Except that kinda made sense.

Rumsfeld made perfect sense. In fact what he said in that speech brilliantly encapsulated everything that could be said on that subject.

But what this woman is saying is just incomprehensible bollocks. Why am I not surprised?

tayto said...

she'd be out of here depth in a car park puddle

Anonymous said...

I heard heard her on Today, her fatuous attempt to defend the indefensible (twice),( the other being about not feeling safe at night), was too apalling for words, and she is Home Secretary. Good grief.

Margaret on the Guillotine said...

Prescott lives!

Anonymous said...

"It's like listening to Donald Rumsfeld's 'known unknowns'. Except that kinda made sense."

So kind of like the rest of us feel when we listen to Boris then...

Not a sheep said...

Rumsfeld's remarks made perfect sense but you had to think a bit; something that was clearly beyond the capabilities of most of the "satirical commentators" on BBC topical quizzes. Jacqui Smith's comments cannot surely be as you have reproduced them; if they were said like that then she is either suffering from a touch of the Prescotts or is a trifle hard of thinking.

The Grumbler said...

My favourite bit is:

"If, unfortunately I and many other experts are right"...

Surely that should be "I, and the experts I have consulted...", or is she honestly lumping herself in with anti-crime and terrorism professionals?

i spy strangers said...

Brewery a organise piss in couldn't a up.

Anonymous said...

IF

Jacqui Smith IS Donald Rumsfeld

is Cambo Mc Cain.

He ""Backed"" him again today

Anonymous said...

No fan of Rumsfeld but "unknown unknowns" are a reality and any decent strategist/planner, in whatever field, comprehends and accounts for this.

Jackie Smith, however, scares me - a lot.

Gallimaufry said...

Any more suggestions for unnecessary legislation to counter unlikely contingencies?

How about the Gravity, Supension of Force Act in case Jacqui drops another clanger and physicists work out how to do it or a Statutory Instrument requiring the relevant parts of all Cabinet Ministers clothing to be clearly labelled Arse and Elbow to enable good government.

Anonymous said...

Terror is not a laughing matter. She is right. We do not need pedantry over terror.

Diablo said...

She frightens me because she looks and sounds like a third rate public service manager who's been over-promoted. I used to work on the NHS and there were a lot of them there.

As well as being out of her depth, she has no depth either.

Be afraid, be very afraid.

verity said...

Differences between international strategist Ivy League Donald Rumsfeld and Jacqui Uh-Who? ...

1. Donald Rumsfeld is - or was, eight years ago; I know he's almost 10 years older now - a BABE.

2. Jacqui Smith has never approached this status, even when a babe in arms.

3. Donald Rumsfeld's 'known unknowns' is piercingly astute.

4. Jacqui Smith's doner (sp?) kebab purchase is ... not.

5. Donald Rumsfeld is thin and looks fit, elegant and beautifully tailored.

6. Jacqui Smith - does not copy. Does not copy. Does not copy...

7. Donald Rumsfeld has a name that sounds real and serious.

8. Jacqui has a name, like Cherie, that is redolent of the council estate. Like Chantelle or something.

Need I say another word?

Troll Patrol said...

there seems to be a tacit belief that once the rozzers have collared a potential crimonist (sorry "freedom fighter") they'll be so discombobulated they'll leg it back to Islamastan quick smart. I sincerely hope that is the case. But in the real world....I know what I know but I am not sure I know what I don't know.

Tom FD said...

Sorry to hijack the thread, but I am appalled by the Liberal Democrats getting away with asserting that the treaty is different to the constitution because a no vote on the EU constitution would have meant we'd be "out of Europe". It's utter tosh, as witnessed most obviously by France and the Netherlands having voted against it and still being central to Europe. It worries me that this blatantly untrue idea could catch on - yet nobody seems to be making this easy clarification (which would be hugely embarrassing for Clegg, whose first move as new leader appears to be to prop up the most idiotic policy of his predecessor).

bebopper said...

Jacqui Smith was a Domestic Science teacher in a second rate comprehensive school.
As an ex-Labour party activist, I can tell you that just a few of the local party members can be bothered to represent them at the Annual Confererence.
And if you ingratiate yourself with local members, you can be assured of support when a parliamentary vacancy arises.
Cometh the hour, cometh ambitious duds like Jacqui Smith.

verity said...

Bebopper - Well, what the hell is "domestic science"? Housekeeping? Is it the same as when American women in the Fifties started calling themselves "household engineers"?

What science degree does fat Jac have? I think we should follow up on this arcane "science".

Is "domestic science" a degree in eating? Let's have a definition of "domestic science", given fat Jacqui has a degree in is. Loading the washing machine? That's a science? Making a grilled cheese sandwich? Pouring that generic blue liquid down the loo? Gosh, I must be a PhD!

Clearly, Jacqui Smith is a non-job contendah (Heavy Weight Division).

Anonymous said...

How we still laugh at Rummy's 'known unknowns'. Anyone who doesn't understand that quote really ought to stick with Harry Potter and not try reading anything too hard.

AethelBald, King of Wessex said...

You have to admire her cool, though. The interviewer, an aggressive woman whose name escapes, scoff-laughed in her face on air, and she didn't get even a little bit upset. If I, or anybody I know, had uttered such nonsense in public, I would be flustering even before someone scoffed.

So maybe that's the secret: you don't need brains but you do need low-empathy.

Michael Francis said...

It is surprising that you didn't mention Caroline Quinn's spontaneous fit of the giggles at this point. Poor Ms.Smith is not the sharpest knife in the block is she?

Auntie Flo' said...

Given up all pretence of using plain English then, Ms Smith?

Vol Abroad said...

ha ha - heard that while lying in bed - too lazy to look it up myself - glad you captured it.

if the hypothetical becomes reality it's no longer hypothetical

bwaaa-ha-ha-ha!

Oscar Miller said...

"Low-empathy" - is that a polite way of saying the skin of a rhinocerous? That Jacqui certainly has. Sadly she's also got the brain of a rhinocerous. If you wanted to hear a clear, straightforward argument for extending detention without charge you needed to watch Ray Mallon (ex Mayor of Middlesborough) on the DP. Due to the breaking Hain news his slot got cut. I hope they invite him on again. Now if a man like that was Home Sec the government could gain some credibility. As for Rumsfield - his logic was impeccable and profound. So no wonder the BBC scoffed.
Archroy at 9.43am - Nice one!

judith said...

Mind you, if Smith was being interviewed by that awful Quin woman, I could just about, almost, feel sorry for her.

Quin always speaks as though she has someone giving her instructions through her headphones, and hasn't learned how to cover it. It has the same effect as someone talking to you at a party, but scanning the room with their eyes to look for someone more 'important' to be with.

Can't listen to Westminster Hour on Sunday nights anymore because she's in charge.

killemallletgodsortemout said...

I was laughing so much at this on my way into work that I nearly came unglued.

My laughing stopped when I almost smashed the car up.

Expert, indeed!

space. of. waste. a. what.

Roger Thornhill said...

I had to pull up Tim Worstall for jumping on the Rumsfeld "known unknowns" kicking bandwagon only a few days ago.

Shame on you Iain.

I believe Jacqui Smith has known non-working braincells, has unknown non-working braincells, but clearly no known working braincells!