political commentator * author * publisher * bookseller * radio presenter * blogger * Conservative candidate * former lobbyist * Jack Russell owner * West Ham United fanatic * Email iain AT iaindale DOT com
I initially felt so sorry for you, Iai, until I realised I'd misread the title.
I thought it said "Man cut from sex-game ring" and I assumed that you'd been banned from a particularly exotic gentlemen's club for some social gaffe on your part, equivalent to being cashiered from one's regiment.
Let me guess his excuse...he fell on top of it? ;)
Technological advencement... in days of Old when Knights were bold and women weren't invented, men drilled holes in wooden poles, to keep themselves contented...
Dave H. Question is what were they looking for in the dark?
I used to live next to an A&E nurse in London and she had seen them all, carrots...oh I fell over in the garden! Hose pipe, the same.
Sorry to say the best one was probably the most painful, tears to the eyes one. My alsation was jealous of my girlfriend (mistress) and bit me! It was "broken" and had to be put into a splint. (and he had to explain it to the wife as well).
19 comments:
eeeeuuuurrrrggghhh!
In the words of James May "oh cock"
Kinda heavy relief but whatever floats your boat.
WV: Cutvalci - sounds painful.
Well at least it didn't have teeth.. ?
Derek Draper will no doubt take this article literally and publish the story on his blog......
Fire crews carry specialist tools for removing rings from people’s fingers.
The mind boggles...makes a change from the vacuum cleaner I suppose!!
True story: a work colleague's wife worked as a nurse and she once helped remove a torch that was stuck up a patient's bottom.
The best thing of all though, when they finally had fished it out, was that it was switched on!
It's more than a tad ironic that there was an advert asking if I wanted to buy chocolates for my lover right below the entry...
On a side note, ignore these ridiculous accusations from Dolly Draper and LabourLost. We still love you. Don't let the bastard grind you down!
Oh Iain, you really are such a tease sometimes...
I initially felt so sorry for you, Iai, until I realised I'd misread the title.
I thought it said "Man cut from sex-game ring" and I assumed that you'd been banned from a particularly exotic gentlemen's club for some social gaffe on your part, equivalent to being cashiered from one's regiment.
/glances at previous post...
Well at least a lib-dumb councillor didn't block the emergency access!
Here are two more specimens. NB: persons of a nervous disposition should NOT follow this link.
"Worst I ever saw was a chap with a length of aluminium pipe stuck on his erect old chap."
Let me guess his excuse...he fell on top of it? ;)
Killemall - eh?
Let me guess his excuse...he fell on top of it? ;)
Technological advencement... in days of Old when Knights were bold and women weren't invented, men drilled holes in wooden poles, to keep themselves contented...
@ Dave H...
Maybe the person in question didn't quite understand what a fleshlight was?
Dave H. Question is what were they looking for in the dark?
I used to live next to an A&E nurse in London and she had seen them all, carrots...oh I fell over in the garden! Hose pipe, the same.
Sorry to say the best one was probably the most painful, tears to the eyes one. My alsation was jealous of my girlfriend (mistress) and bit me! It was "broken" and had to be put into a splint. (and he had to explain it to the wife as well).
And the next word verification is......beatin
and the next is chaines...where do they get them from?
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