Friday, July 25, 2008

Another Chipmunk Fan Comes Out of the Closet


Finally, I have an ally in my fight to defend the nation's favourite chipmunk. This is Charles Moore, writing in this week's Spectator...
Hazel Blears ... is frequently denigrated in the Tory press. I met her for the first time last week, and found her delightful. She is kind and pretty, with the attractive energy that sometimes goes with being small. She is a proper Labour person (which so few of them are). She thinks about how to make life better for the poor and robustly opposes all alliances with any ideology — Islamism being the latest intruder in this country — which would make their life worse.
See, it's not just me. Maybe we should form a support group.

37 comments:

The Raven said...

And where can I get this drug that you and Charles Moore are smoking?

Ian Thorpe said...

Hey, I used to have a couple of Chipmunks records way back before my voice broke.

Perhaps we should lobby Wogan to give the squeaky voiced ones* a bit of a revival. Although I still prefer to think of Haze as a Smurf.

*Actually I think the three Chipmunks were voiced by one person.

Auntie Flo' said...

Iain, you aren't Hazel's secret love child, by any chance? Only the resemblance between her cheeky smile and yours in this pic is just so striking :)

wrinjkled weasel said...

Crikey! I am just about managing to cope with you being gay. And wearing ties that should get you prosecuted in the Hague. And then you go and do a puff for Hazel Blears.

Are you mad? Hazel Blears? Who wants to give Muzzies loads of money to make them like us?

And yet, inexplicably, I want to shag her.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

I think you and Moore both need sectioning, Iain!

Anonymous said...

I heard her at a conference the other week, and though she wasn't as sneery as she usually is on QT, she was glib, didactic and vacuous.

We know she's one of the many self-inflicted Labour wounds driving the Tories toward a GE victory, but it doesn't mean we have to like them in charge of the country now, because it's bad for the nation.

Man in a Shed said...

Somehow I suspect its just you.

There's a blog devoted to the counter point here at http://blearswatch.blogspot.com/ , I believe the Raven who's your first commenter is responsible ...

I have to say she does seem like good company, but the heat map for the NHS and her Luddite Labour tribalism count against her.

John M Ward said...

One Moore, er "more", fan for Hazel, the Sandi Toksvig lookalike...

Well, after her reaction to the Glasgow East by-election result, I suppose the Chipmunk needed some support.

By the way, am I alone in noticing that there are comments from a good dozen Labour MPs on PoliticsHome on this issue,the odd Union bod, one comment from David Cameron, and a couple of SNP contributions.

To anyone visiting the site, it does rather give the appearance of a strong pro-Labour slant, as have one or two of their headlines recently...

mirtha tidville said...

She`s good for taking the piss out of but thats as far as it should go....

As for Wrinjkled Weasels lustful leerings...not to worry there are tablets available these days.

Bill Quango MP said...

I've invented a new game.
Its called "Anyone But Gordon"

Each player is dealt a hand of cards containing noted Labour MPs.
Basically its top trumps Westminster.You defeat your opponents cards, and the winning card gets to be PM

Hazel Blears stats are

Real looks: 5
Beer goggles looks: 8
Strangeness of voice: 3
Power addiction: 6.5
Fashion sense: 7
Oddball quality: 5
Nannying factor: 7
Charisma: 4
Chance of making it to the final of The Apprentice: 2

Anonymous said...

She denounced Bishop Nazir-Ali's comments but refused to condemn the death threats which he received.
This woman is disgusting.

Madasafish said...

I agree with you.


Preserve Hazel Blears.




Preferably in malt vinegar.

an englishman said...

Dear god you must be mad
She is a brainless, dangerous,
poisonous, politically correct, dominerring witch
Just string her up on the lamposts with the rest

Lola said...

Look, Ian, she may be lovely and charming and cheerful and all that stuff, but she's she bloody well Wrong. She is part of the problem, not part of the solution. I have little doubt that she is essentially a good person, as most people are. But as she is part of the disaster for the UK that is New Labour she stands guilty as charged.

Johnny Norfolk said...

She is just a brain washed foghorn. Repeating over and over again what she has been told to say.

She is as much use as pet hampster.

Tankus said...

Its not just Gordon who needs a padded cell holiday is it .....

you need sectioning

Toby said...

Hazel is the new Kyle!

Gordon said...

Apparantly Gordon Brown is polite, charming, humourous and the life and soul of the party when in private gatherings, but unfortunately I only see him on the media when he spouts rubbish and completely ignores most questions put to him.

Blears may well be lovely in private, but on the media she's one of the worst for spouting such unbelievable nonsense I end up shouting at the TV/radio.

Anonymous said...

Yes but Iain unless you have forgotten you are a sort of married ..........

Well I suppose in that case your 'love' for this person makes perfect sense.

Sorry I even posted.

Anonymous said...

Is anybody on here old enough to remember Hilda Baker? Blears is the reincarnation.

Johnny Norfolk summed it up accurately - 'a brain washed foghorn.'

Ross said...

She's a genuine character with humble roots in a Westminster with way too many boring Oxbridge technocrats, and that alone is a good thing.

That she genuinely cares about the poor and oozes such enthusiasm and pride in her government's record are the main reasons she gets up the noses of hard-right Tories on this site and elsewhere.

I for one hope Hazel gets a decent crack at one of the bigger departments in the next reshuffle.

javelin said...

She is a party politicial mouth piece who is unencumbered by morals.

Colin said...

"I met her for the first time last week, and found her delightful. She is kind and pretty, with the attractive energy that sometimes goes with being small. "

Interesting...

I suppose that in the mind of Mr. Moore these qualities more than make up for the fact that she's a senior henchman in a regime that started an illegal war in Iraq that has led directly to the unlawful deaths of untold thousands of innocent Iraqis.

blears and her comrades in the regime should be vilified wherever they go and never allowed to forget the consequences of their actions.

ranter said...

Well Ian, I just disagree with you, she's dangerous and part of the problem. On a specific point she has approved the Marden Wind Turbine, not a million miles from you, which she seems determined to allow against all the opposition. I know she is also determined to push through other similar schemes in unsuitable areas. I can only assume she really hates certain areas because of their voting preferences. I'm with The Raven and 'Blears Watch', she's hideous!

Anonymous said...

Yes she is a proper job genuine character. There don't seem to be many around in politics these days.

Can't say I agree with her politics but unlike the increasing likes of the bland smarmy Ed Balls's who populate Westminster these days. Who have never experienced 'real life', I have no urge to throw a brick through the screen when she is on the box.

Anonymous said...

wrinjkled weasel said...

"Who wants to give Muzzies loads of money to make them like us?"

Indeed so. She's a dangerous creature hiding behind her own imbecility.

"And yet, inexplicably, I want to shag her."

Not inexplicable. It's the way she crosses her legs to display the thigh all the way up to her butt. It's the rarity value of seeing MP birds doing it.


Anonymous said...

"Is anybody on here old enough to remember Hilda Baker? Blears is the reincarnation."

That's just cruel. Funny though.

Anonymous said...

duncvI have fancied her for a while. Since I saw a picture of her in bike gear.And she is just about the right hight for me.

Do not like her politics but who on the Tory side would I rather be stuck in a lift with?

killemallletgodsortemout said...

(Blears) robustly opposes all alliances with any ideology — Islamism being the latest intruder in this country.......


WTF? Are you on crack? - NO, DON'T ANSWER THAT.

I find her vile, yet eminently shaggable. Now, if only we could find a way to keep her gob shut.....

Colin said...

"WTF? Are you on crack? - NO, DON'T ANSWER THAT.

I find her vile, yet eminently shaggable. Now, if only we could find a way to keep her gob shut....."

If you find her eminently shaggable, why would you want to keep her gob shut?

Sorry, couldn't resist...

wrinkled weasel said...

Hey, look guys, the "I fancy Hazel" thing was a joke ok?

If you want that sort of thing there are plenty of websites available. Just Google "Leather" "Sex Dwarf" "Karl Malden Nose"

If we are playing Boff, Marry, Kill

it has to be

Theresa May

Theresa Villiers

Caroline Flint

or, for those who travel on the other bus...

Ben Bradshaw

Alan Duncan

Simon Hughes

Tankus said...

wrinkled weasel ....are you a plumber by trade ..?

you seem to be keen on fixing up boilers .......

anyway's ...its just a fiendish attempt by Ian to increase postal traffic

Martin said...

If Hazel Blears is the best Nu Liebour has. God help them and us.

Having said that, she's a million times bettre than that awful dragon Harriet Harman, a woman with the face that could wilt a thousand errections.

Martin said...

For those that haven't already. Read what Littlejohn wrote about Caroline Flint in the Mail the other week.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1035028/Is-human-life-Planet-Labour.html

OUCH!

Anonymous said...

A Threesom with Hazel and Edwin

wrinkled weasel said...

Tankus. No, I am not a plumber. Do you think I'm made of money?

Actually, I have to fess up. I wasn't joking about Hazel Blears and yes, it's the leather and the bike that tips it over all the bounds of decorum.

I rang Max Mosely the other day and he suggested a servant and master scenario...

Hazel: Weasel. You have been a very very naughty boy.

Weasel: Yes, mistress.

Hazel: You have been disrepecting Gordon havn't you?

Weasel: Yes, Mistress.

Hazel (Taking off purple basque and getting out a nettle flavoured butt plug)And you know what that means don't you?

Anonymous said...

wrinkled weasel said...

"Actually, I have to fess up."

So. Outed.

Anonymous said...

Iain

You need help.