Thursday, May 24, 2007

Once Upon a Time in Wales...

Glyn Davies lost his seat in the Welsh Assembly on May 3. While I felt very sorry for him at the time, the Assembly's loss was the Blogosphere's gain... Here is his take on the LibDems' decision (or is it a decision?!) to withdraw from coalition talks with Plaid and the Conservatives. Pure brilliance...

Once upon a time, in the ancient kingdom of Cymru, three cute little bears lived in a big glass palace in the City of Cardiff. They were bullied for many years by a big grizzly bear called Rhodri, who lived with his gang in posh offices on the top floor, and ruled the whole kingdom. The cute little bears were called Green Bear, Blue Bear and Yellow Bear.Then one day, Yellow Bear said "I've got an idea. I'm fed up of being ruled by the Grizzly Bear Gang. Why don't we gang up together and take over from them". Blue Bear said "What an absolutely spiffing idea. I'd been thinking along those lines myself". Little Yellow Bear chipped in, saying "Don't forget little me. I want to join in too". So the three cute little bears celebrated with a pot of honey, and out of the empty pot there rose a lovely 'rainbow'. The three said "Let this be a sign". And when they had worked out the details of their plan, they told the world what they were going to do. The boss of the Grizzly Bears, named Rhodri was very sad.But then Little Yellow Bear went with his glad tidings to his National Executive meeting at Llandrindod Wells, where there were only 18 bears from across the land. Lo and behold, 9 of them said that Little Yellow Bear was clever and agreed with the plan - but 9 said that Little Yellow Bear was stupid and disagreed. Unfortunately the Yellow Bears didn't have any way of coming to a decision when the vote was level. (Yes really - I'm told this is true) So Little Yellow Bear started to cry and had to tell nasty Guto and Betsan from the Bears Broadcasting Corporation, who were waiting to pounce outside the door. "Our plan is now ' totally stuffed'. But I am still boss of the yellow bears".Next day, Blue Bear and Green Bear were very angry - and stood on the great steps of the glass palace and 'rubbished' the Yellow Bears unmercifully. The rainbow disappeared, and the 'crock of gold' rolled down the great steps and sunk without trace into the Bay. But wait, some more yellow bears said "We must have a Conference in Aberystwyth to reconsider this, all over again". (The yellow bears have always had problems about deciding things). But old Grizzly Bear heard about this cunning plan, and arranged to have a 'coronation' tomorrow, before the Yellow Bear's conference on Saturday. Tonight, the Grizzly Bear gang are having 10 jars of honey to celebrate - and have sent out the sweetest little grizzly, called Jane Hutt to be humble and say that old grizzly is a 'statesman' who likes nothing more than to chat and frolic with all of the bears - except Blue Bear. At this point Hans Christian Andersen abandoned this fairy story as being so utterly preposterous and unbelievable that no-one would ever believe it or read it. So it was never published until today.

If proof were ever needed that the LibDems are unfit for office, click HERE and read the sorry tale of their Llandindrod Wells meeting.

12 comments:

Montgomeryshire Witness said...

Thank god we had a case of Bird Flu in Wales today. It brought something new to the news agenda that was actually important. Can't we round up some of your bears and see if they catch it if they go visiting Corwen?

Anonymous said...

This tale to be set to music - perhaps played on a Blue bare-faced lyre?

Anonymous said...

Excellent ! It explains this better than I could..

Montgomeryshire..What is your problem with the Welsh Assembly ? Iain tries his best to keep us to up to date with political events, and all you can do is gripe..

Anonymous said...

Iain, You have forgotten to add that the Little Yellow Bear has said 'that his best interests are served in opposition' to the Grizzly Bear...

Perhaps we should Boris the Jackal over there to sort them out...

David Boothroyd said...

The behaviour of the Liberal Democrats after the elections in both Scotland and Wales is shame-facedly hypocritical. After years and years of telling us that we should have proportional representation so that no-one gets an overall majority and the parties have to work together to form stable coalitions which were approved by a majority of voters, then after the election they go away and insist that they will not form a coalition with anyone.

The result is that both Scotland and Wales are going to be ruled by unstable minority governments which were far from winning a majority of anything.

What on earth is the point of campaigning for proportional representation and then refusing to do the thing which makes the system work? The Lib Dems are revealing that their "principles" are ones which they don't actually believe in.h

eddie said...

Hmmm. I keep reading this. Just because there is a hung parliament/assembly it doesn't follow that the Lib Dems must automatically form coalitions left, right and centre. Arguing for PR and supporting coalitions or other arrangements on a case-by-case basis are two entirely different things.

Whiffler said...

Was the '9 yellow bears each way' meeting the one mised by Lembear - who was in the big village recording "Have I got pictures of Bears shitting in the woods For You" ?.

Glyn Holford said...

Perhaps the oldest grizzliest, ex Olypic, yellow Bear wants to be Foreign Secretary in in the event of a Broon Bear Government?

Anonymous said...

"Perhaps the oldest grizzliest, ex Olypic, yellow Bear wants to be Foreign Secretary in in the event of a Broon Bear Government?"

I fear that may be the reason for this astonishing decision.

A chance to be a part of history and bring an end to uninterrupted Labour power in Wales squandered.

Why?

The only reason I can think of is that Ming is putting the pressure on because he has done a deal with Gordon.

He is meant to lead the party and give direction. Juding by the direction he has taken it so far and the direction it is going he is leading it to division and defeat on the altar of his own selfish ambitions.

He's now caused a severe split in the party in Wales by trying to stop the tide against Labour - Labour! Another party.

In Scotland the dividions are already emerging.

http://www.theherald.co.uk/politics/news/display.var.1425196.0.0.php

The Tories are gleefully rubbing their hands at the prospect of picking off their anti-Labour voters.

He should go before he does the party any more damage by making it Labour's poodle.

penlan said...

I don't think it was Ming.It was some internal Lib Dem wrangling for the leadership in Wales.Those dissidents have made their party look ridiculous .Bizarrely,in Wales,a vote for the Lib Dems is a wasted vote even under PR.

Anonymous said...

"Perhaps the oldest grizzliest, ex Olypic, yellow Bear wants to be Foreign Secretary in in the event of a Broon Bear Government?

I fear that may be the reason for this astonishing decision."

You're trying to apply reason to the unreasonable. Have you seen the coalition document? Apart from being uncosted pie-in-the-sky nonsense, it has lots of key Lib Dem policies in it, yet they gibbed. They've just shown that they're unfit for governance and that their whole existance is totally pointless.

Ordovicius said...

Vote Lib Dem, Get Nothing. That's the message that will stick in Welsh voters' memories the next time we go to the polls. The Welsh Lib Dems -rather like their leader Lembo- have commited political suicide.