Bromley LibDem Candidate Ben Abbotts is delivering a TV Quick type leaflet round the constituency at the moment headlined BEN ABBOTTS: LIVING IN THE REAL WORLD. The real world of LibDem by election leaflets maybe - the only thing missing is the slogan BEN ABBOTTS WINNING HERE or one of the LibDem dodgy bar graphs. Or maybe they're on the other side.
Lots of lovely pics of our Ben are proudly displayed. Ben as a baby. Ben as a child. Ben getting hitched. Ben face painting. Ben with children. And then there is a picture of him with some Asian children. We'll return to that one a bit later, so do check back.
There's even a pic of Princess Diana along with some words which sound as if they were written by a twelve year old. "Meeting Princess Diana was really memorable. I'd been chosen by my school to do a reading at a service in Canterbury Cathedral. Priness Diana congratulated me afterwards on how well I'd read. I was really struck by her warmth and kindess."
Really, Really! Enough! But there's more. Beside a beaming Ben on his first day at school we are allowed to enjoy these words of wisdom... "This was my first day at school. My eldest daughter now attends a school in Bromley Borough. She makes me so proud."
Note the phrase Bromley Borough. Translation: The School's in Beckenham, outside the constituency. Later on we learn: Zara's a teacher in Bromley Borough. Translation: Zara's a teacher in Beckenham.
Not a single word of anything Ben actually believes in or has a view on. So next time the LibDems have a go at David Cameron for being 'policy-lite', quote this leaflet back at them.
Do check back a little later to learn more about young Ben's gap year in Asia. We think he may have been embellishing his Far East experience somewhat.