Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Great Conspiracy Theories of Our Time: No 94: DD (Not) for Speaker

Now I really have heard it all. According to Ben Brogan, DD's resignation is because ... wait for it ... he wants to be Speaker of the House of Commons. RAOTFLOL* or whatever the phrase is.

Mind you, not such a bad idea, come to think of it...

*Roll all over the floor laughing out loud.

UPDATE: Diary columnists alert: I have just spoken to DD about the magnificent prospect of his taking over the Speakership. Once he had recovered from several minutes of laughter he declared: "I haven't got the legs for it and I doubt whether I'd look good in tights." Which begs so many questions...

15 comments:

Flora said...

I KNOW... roflmao... meh.

[if today is the acceptable day to be using txt spk]

Anonymous said...

It's ROFL or ROFLMAO.

Anonymous said...

I love how you pretend to be above the "diary columnists" whereas in fact you're running a small diary story in this post and that's all. In fact a media diary story, since your essential point is Brogan made a mistake.

Iain Dale said...

Feel free to point out where I consider myself above a diary column. I sued to write one, and half this blog is the equivalent, so pull your finger out of your arse.

If you actually read Ben's piece you can see he didn't really believe a word of it but thought it an amusing story to tell. And he was right.

Anonymous said...

"I sued to write one, and half this blog is the equivalent, so pull your finger out of your arse."

Hmmm.

I knew you were a media whore, Iain, but I didn't know you'd take legal action to become one!

Anonymous said...

As we're on the subject of Arses, Iain, here's what you said:
"UPDATE: Diary columnists alert: I have just spoken to DD"
Now, if we allow a little literary interpretation of the sort that Andy Burnham of Blessed Memory was subjected to, it's pretty bloody obvious that your subtext was "I am better than a diarist, and will point out that anyone looking for a story doesn't have the hotline to DD that I have".
Now, as for your criticism of "Ben" - yes, I did read his piece, and see that he thought the rumour silly. But you don't adequatley portray that in your own media diary article.

Ps. Do you mean "used"?

Anonymous said...

I have awful feeling that the next soeaker might be Norman Baker

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

More likely he wants to be PM.

Anonymous said...

Interesting how DD snooping state theme has suddenly become the topic of comments about local councils abusing their powers - with hardly a mention of DD.

Anonymous said...

Any fule no that Speakers have to be (a) Scots and (b) Useless.

So obviously the next Speaker is Gordon Brown.

Can you imagine PMQs?

Mr Speaker (for it is he): "Order. Mr erm... Cle.. No, wait, Mr erm... Ba..., no wait, Mr erm... Mili..., no wait... Order. I am pleased to inform the House that Sir Ronald McDonald-Already has agreed to head up an Inquiry as to whose turn it is to ask questions and that he will report within the next three and half years... Order."

Anonymous said...

"I haven't got the legs for it and I doubt whether I'd look good in tights."

Which falls some way short of an outright denial

Paul Linford said...

"I haven't got the legs for it and I doubt whether I'd look good in tights."

Given that the Speaker doesn't wear tights any more, I think this has to go down as a classic non-denial.

Anonymous said...

Apparently David Icke is out getting nominations for H&H (apparently he's been asking the local flying saucer club, amongst others), so we should see some real conspiracy theories in the near future.

Which of the candidates are really twelve-foot lizards?

Anonymous said...

What is DDs view on the collapse of high profile criminal cases due to witness anonymity? Will he back a new piece of legislation to remove the historical right to face one's accusers? Or would he let the murderers backout on the streets in the cause of Liberty?

Scipio said...

Gwyneth Dunwoody for Speaker! Even from beyond the grave, she would do a better job than that disgrace Martin!