Thursday, November 30, 2006

Quotes of the Day

"It is unusual to get something useful" - The Duke of Edinburgh on being presented with a silver tankard at the Caledonian Club in London's Belgravia.
"Personally, I would introduce a shoot-to-kill policy" - Best-selling author Bill Bryson on his war against litter louts.
"The press provide the only curb on Government excesses. Democracy does not work with an opposition that rolls over or nowadays seems to agree with everything" - Actress Sheila Hancock, who also praises broadcast inquisitors with the "killer punch".
"If you're alive, you've got to flap your arms and legs, you've got to jump around a lot. For life is the very opposite of death and you must at the very least think noisily and colourfully, or you're not alive" - Mel Brooks.
"My sense is that the real David Cameron has not stood up, that the real David Cameron is a hardline Thatcherite" - Health Minister Andy Burnham.
"Please do not bathe outside the bathtub" - Notice spotted in a hotel in Colombo, Sri Lanka.
"Don't take life too seriously because nobody gets out of it alive" - Entertainer Joe Pasquale.
"Nigella Lawson dresses in gorgeous scarlet for her Christmas Kitchen on BBC2, surely knowing that not one viewer in a million will bother to cook anything she enthuses about" - Commentator Janet Street-Porter.
"It is unusual to meet a working-class Liverpudlian who dresses for dinner, other than in the sense of putting on a shirt" - Academic Professor Terry Eagleton, of the University of Manchester.
"Britain is going through a bit of a panic about the role of God in society" - Tory MP Boris Johnson.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

"My sense is that the real David Cameron has not stood up, that the real David Cameron is a hardline Thatcherite"

I hope he's right!

Cranmer said...

Britain is going through a bit of a panic about the role of God in society

And, indeed, whether there should be any such role at all, and, if so, which god should be chief. And then we might ask who represents this god to the people? Who speaks and acts on his/her/their/its behalf? And then, why should we believe them?

Boris is wise. Religion and politics are very close indeed. He is deceived who believes otherwise.

verity said...

Mel Brookes is wonderful.

John Sandell said...

Is it too late to add to the list a headline that's just appeared on the Beeb site?

"Minister in moon talks with Nasa."

It's where most ministers seem to live these days...

Expat said...

"Liverpudlian" suggests an absence of both working and class.

Anonymous said...

Much more likely,

God is going through a bit of a panic about the role of Boris in Britain.

Will said...

And coincidentally Sheila Hancock is on my TV screen as I read that post.

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

Mel Brookes: That's all he's flapping?!
Janet Street-Porter: Can't get "Nigella's Xmas Kitchen" here in Sicily, but if I could, I'd be cooking her dishes!
Iain: like these quotes. Could you do a round-up like this every week? Buona serata, WL.

Anonymous said...

Iain, I am very cross with you !

You left out the best bit of Janet Stree' Por-er's quote about Nigella.

Possibly this was due to it being too early. But now we are the watershed.

[J S-P] 'Once the two sad chaps in Men Behaving Badly made jokes about watching Cindy Crawford's exercise video after a drunken night down at the pub - now Nigella fulfils the same urgent need'.

Normally I wouldn't find these posh types attractive, but in her case..

Anonymous said...

My favourite ever quote was by Gen. John de Chastelain. It had been suggested to him, by a lady, that the amount of arms decommissioned at an early stage of the peace process by one of the parties was fairly small.

He was not at liberty to say. But -

'I would never argue with a woman's intuition'.

Wise words indeed..

towcestarian said...

[J S-P] 'Once the two sad chaps in Men Behaving Badly made jokes about watching Cindy Crawford's exercise video after a drunken night down at the pub - now Nigella fulfils the same urgent need'.

Very true, Janet. However, I can't say I have ever had the same urges where Ms Street-Porter is concerned. Do I detect a teeny note of female sex-appeal envy going on here?

Rush-is-Right said...

"The press provide the only curb on Government excesses. Democracy does not work with an opposition that rolls over or nowadays seems to agree with everything" - Actress Sheila Hancock, who also praises broadcast inquisitors with the "killer punch".

The lady is right. Probably a first though, she used to boast about being a Labour Lovie. Still, for every sinner that repenteth......

verity said...

Re Thursday night's Doughty Street - that is more like it! Totty for girls! That Norwegian MP was articulate and funny in his second language - something I will never achieve - and Cor! - wotta lookah! And low-key and funny. (You can see I have given some thought to this.)

And I loved the Sri Lankan, who was also very attractive, charming, thoughtful and articulate. He was lovely because he actually thought before he opened his mouth. The American was quite OK, but the Norwegian and the Sri Lankan were just outstanding.

Anonymous said...

boris johnson.. brilliant..

Chris said...

Joe Pasquale? Balls! That's Hank Williams, whose shoe Pasquale is not worthy to clean with his tongue:

Everything I do seems to get me down,
If I jumped into the river, I would prob'ly drown;
No matter how I struggle and strive,
I'll never get out of this world alive.

(The last line is the song title.)

Anonymous said...

Iain, agree with Welshcakes, a round up at the end of each week would be good - we could even help you out !

Much better than a tawdry caption contest...

machiavelli said...

Re. Professor Terry Eagleton's comment: Liverpudlians more usually put a suit on for court appearances

raincoaster said...

Someone on my blog made a very interesting comment about God. I had quoted Robert Kennedy on racism and divinity, and my friend replied that God couldn't be black, because God is everywhere and if He were black we wouldn't be able to see anything. A practical approach to religion is often useful.