Friday, May 05, 2006

What Will be in the Saturday Papers?


Back in the mid 1970s my Father decided he wanted to show me how they used to harvest wheat in "the olden days" ie when he was my age. So he bought an old binder - the forerunner of the Combine Harvester. He then grew wheat which produced straw which could be made into 'corn dollies'. The wheat sheaves would be stored on wooden palletts on the farm and each Spring we would dispose of the unsold wheatsheaves. As each pallett was emptied the rats which lived under it would move to the next one. And when we got to the last pallet it was literally heaving with rats. We made sure we had strong tied around our wellington boots to ensure the rats couldn't crawl up our trousers (sorry if you're eating while reading this!). Some brave soul would lift the final pallet and 50 or 60 rats would emerge and run in all directions. Our Jack Russell and Golden retriever thought all their Christmases had come at once. But there were so many rats, they literally didn't know which way to turn. And that's a rather long-winded way of explaining what is going on in the political lobby tonight. There are so many stories that the journalists don't know which one to concentrate on first - Clarke sacked - Prescott not quite sacked - Ed Balls joins Treasury - Reid's agenda at the Home Office - or, perish the thought, Labour's terrible local election results . Which is exactly what Tony Blair was relying on when he launched his 'bury bad news' reshuffle. Let's see who has the last laugh. Do your duty, boys and girls.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, don't forget the loans.

Anonymous said...

An English Home Secretary and Transport Secretary would have been nice -- given that many and all their functions have been devolved...

Richard said...

Those of us who have had to deal with rats for a living - the real ones - know that when you get to the "last pallet" you surround it with sticky boards before disturbing it. That way, when the rats make the break, they get stuck, tar baby fashion. You can finish them off at your leisure, without even breaking a sweat.

There has to be a political lesson there, somewhere.