Iain Dale's Diary: Dinner with Portillo In the Buff?

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Dinner with Portillo In the Buff?

In mid May the Conservatives will be holding a major fundraiser with the oligatory auction. Here are some of the lots...

1. A week of luxury on the Isle of Wight

2. Dinner for two with Michael Portillo

3. A helicopter ride for two down the Thames

4. A chauffeur driven in the latest Rolls-Royce for shopping, high tea at Brown’s Hotel, VIP seats at Andrew Lloyd-Webber’s Sound of Music and a deluxe double room at Brown’s Hotel
5. Opera, personalised and performed just for you
6. A house painting commission 24” x 30” in oil, by William Eyre

7. A charcoal nude drawing by Chloe Cloherty. 32” wide x 42” high.

A thought strikes me. Is Lot 7 carried out immediately after Lot 2. I think we should be told.

23 comments:

Alex said...: A week of luxury on the Isle of Wight?

That would be a first.; March 04, 2008 11:59 am
Anonymous said...: Sometimes you're very interesting to read, Iain. And then others...; March 04, 2008 12:03 pm
Anonymous said...: I'd pay £50 not to have to go for dinner with portaloo even if he stays clothed...; March 04, 2008 12:06 pm
Anonymous said...: No I don't think so, sorry.; March 04, 2008 12:07 pm
Anonymous said...: Impossible. It says 32" wide by 42" high.; March 04, 2008 12:30 pm
Anonymous said...: 4. A chauffeur driven in the latest Rolls-Royce for shopping, high tea at Brown’s Hotel, VIP seats at Andrew Lloyd-Webber’s Sound of Music and a deluxe double room at Brown’s Hotel

The chauffeur is getting the best part of this deal. Think about it.

On the other hand, he has to put up with ALW and Brown's. But on balance.....; March 04, 2008 12:43 pm
Anonymous said...: Iain - can you let me know where the fundraiser is? I can't find anything going on in May on the party website.; March 04, 2008 12:53 pm
Anonymous said...: Pretty s*it prizes on offer! What about:-i) life membership of the Carlton;ii)an autographed expenses claim form by Derek Conway;iii)a £10 prize for every cock-up by Boris Johnson during a calendar year? Were they struggling to think of prizes people would actually want, so they decided to go the other way- prizes people don't want!I wonder what the Libbies would have on offer:-i) an 'under the table' drinking competition with Charlie K;ii) a night out with Hughes and Oaten;iii)an evening ballroom dancing with Vince Cable....; March 04, 2008 12:57 pm
Andy said...: Is this the most tenuous link for a story ever?; March 04, 2008 1:01 pm
Anonymous said...: I've never been to an "oligatory auction". Is it just for the select few Conservatives?; March 04, 2008 1:20 pm
Anonymous said...: London Tory defects to Paddick

http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard-mayor/article-23447881-details/Senior+London+Tory+defects+to+support+Paddick+campaign/article.do; March 04, 2008 1:22 pm
Anonymous said...: Anything on offer that someone who doesn't live in Notting Hill might be interested in and/or be able to afford?

Does anyone sane ever go to anything that ALW has had anything to do with?; March 04, 2008 1:39 pm
Anonymous said...: "High tea" at Brown's?? Who wrote this? How ghastly.

"High tea" is baked beans on toast. It is a term used in the North for supper around six or six-thirty.

Please let the ignorant, pretentious writer of these Godawful prizes know that "high tea" does not mean "high class". I think the term the writer was seeking to such sad effect is "tea".; March 04, 2008 1:55 pm
Anonymous said...: For the new conservatives and their beautiful green tree, these prizes are remarkably unenvironmental! helicopters, rolls, etc; March 04, 2008 2:16 pm
Anonymous said...: I've never heard the evening meal being called high tea in the North East; nonetheless it is served in the better hotels at the usual time, around 4pm.

I wouldn't mind a meal with Michael, whatever he chooses to wear, just so long as he's not cooking it. I remember his efforts with his life swap week.; March 04, 2008 2:40 pm
Anonymous said...: behave yourself Ian!; March 04, 2008 2:42 pm
Anonymous said...: tizzy - They call "tea" "high tea"? You have "tea" at tea time. Working men coming home after work expect to have a high tea when they get in. It usually has lots of carbs for men who have been doing physical labour all day.; March 04, 2008 3:08 pm
Anonymous said...: Hold me back and book me a seat in
the front row.

The first Lot must be a perfect example of an oxymoron.

Doing the rounds of Association Branch functions in a then particulary active constituency, one bottle of Slovenian Reisling appeared in some four consecutive functions before someone either drank it or offloaded it in a non-Conservative Raffle (i.e. the local branch of the RNLI)

This seems the same on a grander scale.; March 04, 2008 4:47 pm
Philipa said...: I would pay NOT to do most of those, especially #4.

As a fundraiser for the Tories I take it they don't need the money then..; March 04, 2008 6:45 pm
Anonymous said...: Verity said... High tea is baked beans on toast. It is a term used in the North for supper around six or six-thirty.

Verity, where did you grow up? In most of England it is a light meal with cold meat, served late afternoon.

At school (in the home counties)whenever we had a football or cricket match against a visiting tea we always had 'high tea' afterwards.; March 04, 2008 10:56 pm
Anonymous said...: Verity: From your time in KL you will know that most hotels here serve "high tea" - usually a fairly substantial buffet selection - ranging from cooked food to cakes and coffee from around mid afternoon until an hour or so before the dinner crowd arrives. However, I confess that before I came to Malaysia I had never encountered the term high tea anywhere else. Anything food or drink wise between say 4-6pm was simply "tea time".; March 05, 2008 6:32 am
Anonymous said...: Wow! You tories really know how to live!

tee hee!; March 05, 2008 10:03 am
Anonymous said...: I have heard the term 'high tea' throughout my life (some six decades) - never known, for sure, what it meant. I had an impression that it meant different things to different people. Pleased to see that I was right.; March 05, 2008 10:04 am