Wednesday, October 25, 2006

John Prescott Holds Nuke Talks with North Korea...

...And in other news today, Mr Bean persuades President Ahmendinijad to abandon his nuclear programme. Later in the programme we're given exclusive access to Jack and Jill as they go up the hill to fetch a pail of water.

UPDATE: And in a Sportsflash just reaching us, West Ham United manage to score a goal [sorry, too far fetched - ed].

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

Having looked at this piece I fear that the latest Hammers performance has had a deeper effect than previously thought!!!

Gracchi said...

Yes I couldn't quite beleive the Times's Headline yesterday- Prescott off as Diplomatic Troubleshooter- hell the man couldn't do diplomacy in Hull let alone the Far East.

Bob Piper said...

Late and breaking news, and even more unlikely.... West Ham United have won a match!!

AnyonebutBlair said...

Don't you mean "John Prescott holds nude talks with North Korea..." and then gropes some Communist party official

Ken from Gloucester said...

I cant work out who is more dangerous for world peace, Prescott or the truly mad ruler of North Korea!!

Anonymous said...

In sports news: West Ham have won an away game.

Anonymous said...

Iain are you drunk?

Jo said...

I don't want to intrude into private grief but was surprised to see no comments on the mighty spireites well deserved victory last night?

AnyonebutBlair said...

As the Torygraph says, The US sends Condi Rice, we send a blithering buffoon who can't keep his zipper up and penis to himself. What a statement about the quality of governance we have in this country. I hope Kim doesn't introduce Prezza to his harem...hang on maybe it would be great if he did, beacause Prezza would never leave

Chuck Unsworth said...

What chance is there of the Koreans understanding Prescott's version of the English language? Is he likely to try to resolve any differences in a physical manner? If so he'll have to watch out - all these guys do Tae Kwon Do, apparently, although they might go for the nuclear option.

And what about those ceremonial banquets? It's known that he likes the occasional Chinese (maybe in more ways than one), but one wonders about how he'll get on with roast dog. Sadly that also brings to mind his relationships with dogs and, perhaps, roasting. Speaking of which, maybe Margaret Beckett will be disappointed not to have been invited to the party. Perhaps the caravan would not have stood up to the overland journey, but surely she could have arranged for an airlift from East Midlands airport, as she so often does.

Anyway I'm really looking forward to seeing JP return to Heathrow clutching a piece of paper and declaring 'Peace (or is that Piece?) in our time'.

Shotgun said...

I has never ceased to amaze me how New Labour engage in such blatant spin and propoganda. This is why it was alwasy bound to end in tears, from trying to contune with the myth of '18 years of Tory mismanagement' to how Bliar and Brown are the best of freinds.

They are absolutely without shame or principle.

Anonymous said...

I just hope they do not annoy him- he throw a punch, miss and hit the nuclear button.

Anonymous said...

Good line Iain, made me chuckle. Am surprised you haven't mentioned ICM's poll this morning though. Continuing with the stream of consciousness - are you one of the Pardew Out crew yet?

Julian H

Anonymous said...

'18 years of Tory mismanagement'

Lest we forget, Thatcher was still trying to blame things on Jim Callaghan at the end of her term in office!

Geoffrey G Brooking said...

Maybe he should do us all a favour by claiming political asylum over there while he's at it.

At least it would save the Government lawyers money in defending his roles in both the alleged Super Casino debacle and the Casj for Peerages row.

CityUnslicker said...

I think this explains alot. I always thougth Prezza was speaking a foreign language; that it is Korean does not surprise me at all.

Vlad the Impala said...

After his trip to Korea, we have the Arab-Israeli dispute, the ending of world hunger, readjustment of global fiscal imbalances and reinvigoration of international trade talks. Panty removal in Pyongpang will seem like a piece of cake, relatively speaking.

Continuing along this theme, John Reid can take charge of ballet policy and Gordon can run some sessions on emotional intelligence. Tessa Jowell can be tasked with corporate social responsibility and Margaret Hodge can resume her portfolio of child abuse, sorry, make that childcare. As for the Strawman, he is already in charge of parliamentary democracy, having done such a stunning job introducing same into Iraq.

No, you really couldn't make it up....

Ross F said...

Kim Jonh Il and John Prescott actually have a lot in common-

Kim recently tested his No Dong missile system and according to his mistress Prezza also has no dong.

Kim Jong Il is unable to speak English, as is 2 Jags.

They both have a taste for extravagent houses funded by the taxpayer.

Anonymous said...

After he's sorted out Korea and the middle east perhaps he could take on a really tough task by sorting out Gordon & Tony?

Peter from Putney said...

Just what IS happening at WHU - has Pardew lost the dressing room?

malcolm said...

Iain, if you think you've got problems try folowing Leeds United like me.

Lagwolf said...

Well maybe its a stroke of genius and a veiled threat. "If you don't stop you nuclear testing we are going to send Prezza to stay with you and chat until you do."

Anonymous said...

The North Korean leader is under threat and in a quandry. Prescot has offered not to break wind or grope his wife (Prescotts or Kims) during the visit.

We may yet have (mushy) peace in our time.

Shotgun said...

Anonymous said...

'18 years of Tory mismanagement'

Lest we forget, Thatcher was still trying to blame things on Jim Callaghan at the end of her term in office!

10:06 AM


Quite right anonamong.

We can't compare what Labour inherited in 1997 with what Labour bequeathed in 1979 now can we?

Idiot.

no longer anonymous said...

We're doomed.

Joe Taylor said...

Iain,

When you're finished with Alan Pardew can Sheffield Wednesday please have him? ;-)

Dick Turpin said...

I hope Kim Jong II doesn't throw any eggs

cynical sid said...

Sending the 'Count of Houmberside' (I know, there's no 'O' in Humberside) - to the Far East is nothing more than an insult to millions of people who are worried about their future. It demonstrates perfectly the lack of intelligence of this government and the contempt they hold for the ordinary citizens of the world.