Monday, August 20, 2007

And I Think to Myself...

What a wonderful word we live in. In today's Times we learn that the government continues to lie to us over the new EU constitution, that 181 Chinese miners are feared dead, that a freed French paedophile was prescribed with Viagra in prison and then raped a five year old boy on his release, a massive hurricane is hitting Jamaica, the Australian Leader of the Opposition has been forced to apologise for going to a New York strip club but can't remember what happened and the South African Health Minister is an alcoholic who has been accused of jumping the queue for a new liver.

Still, Man U got beaten and Tim Henman's putting himself out of his misery and retiring. So it's not all bad news.

55 comments:

Cranmer said...

And God is in his Heaven!

The news simply and invariably focuses on the negative. Sadly, His Grace has succombed, but there are very many positives, and one's hope should keep one irrepressibly joyful.

Curly said...

"The South African Health Minister is an alcoholic who has been accused of jumping the queue for a new liver."

Is this illustrative of the parlous state of South African cuisine?

Still, it goes down well with onion gravy and chips.

Newmania said...

the Australian Leader of the Opposition has been forced to apologise for going to a New York strip club but can't remember what happened


I can’t see what the problem is anyway.Men have their primal needs and the beast needs to take a run around the park every now and then.
Anyway Iain Dale surely you aren’t going to pretend that in addition to not smoking or drinking you have never been to a venue of ill repute . I don`t know exactly what the gay equivalent is but I am certain there is one and you have enthusiastically whooped at a chap dressed as a Fireman ..or something ( ...I `m floundering here )...perhaps a naked book of electoral statistics in your case.

I should get all the sex in you can it can’t be long before Brown banns it altogether which would be a great waste of Caroline Flint ....( who has no other useful function I can think of)

Don`t be such a misery even Cranmer was a bit disingenuous about his German wife in his day . WEREN`T YOU YOU GRACE they are all at it Iain.

Vindico said...

Sounds like one of the better snapshots of the world!!

Anonymous said...

What's the world coming to when not even an Aussie politician can't get a f***?

At least the French understand the purpose of being in politics as does Lembit...

Politics exists so that ugly bastards can get a shag.
Tap

Londoner said...

I am extremely surprised that in mentioning Man U, you did not point out that West Ham is one place above them (according to my paper).

On the bright side: we have Boris V. Ken to look forward to.

Adding though to the negative, it seems that the Daily Telegraph team is now descending further downmarket from ex-Mail to ex-Sun people and with dear Bill now gone too as well as Frank J, what newspaper is one supposed to read? And please can they surgically remove the Heffer ranting from Saturdays so at least one can continue to buy it that day to read Charles Moore (and the fluffy supplements that ones wife likes, such as Xanthe Clay on food)? (Don't have to buy it midweek for yours, Iain, as you'dd always flag it on here.)

strapworld said...

Now for The good news.

Didn't the tory party lie to us all about the EU? Is it still telling us lies? John Redwood's paper still relies on EU colleagues agreeing to his suggestions! WHAT IF AND WHEN THEY SAY NON?

The floods in our Country are STILL an issue. No money forthcoming from Brown. WHERE is the Tory opposition?

Crime and Disorder abound where is the punishment for offenders? WHAT will the Tories offer? Free hoodies for everyone!

The Scots, Welsh and Irish get better facilities than the English. What are the Tories going to do for the English?

The green debate is now the new puritanical debate nobody can argue against it YET with NASA getting the statistics wrong just WHERE is the truth?

We have three political mparties with virtually the same views...where is the opposition? where is the alternative?

Gosh there is NO good news.

londonerr said...

The story from SA is better than that Iain, she is an alcoholic and a thief.

see here --> http://www.thetimes.co.za/PrintEdition/Article.aspx?id=542808

antifrank said...

What is this word we live in and why is it so wonderful? Or are you making an incredibly subtle allusion to the Christian idea of "logos" as expounded in the Gospel of John?

londonerr said...

The story from SA is better than that Iain, she is an alcoholic and a thief.

Sunday Times article here

simon said...

It is a complete and utter fallacy that the Scots have better facilities than the English. 'Free personal care' for the elderly is hit and miss; and although Scotland gets extra money ( from the English tax-payer) , it is STILL a grade-1 sh*tehole! Why on Earth do you think that most prominent Scottish MP's choose not to sit in the comedy of errors that is Holyrood? And poor bloody Malawi. Being lectured by Scotland at how to be a 'modern country'( Scotland the world leader in obesity, alcoholism, sectarianism,croneyism: and a recent report puts Scotland at the BOTTOM of a European league for something or other!!!). Poor buggers!

Anonymous said...

You missed the Daily Mail's "Cameron returns to political frontline with savage attack on Brown"

The Hitch said...

And that Mr Dale was one of your best ever postings.
I wonder what tim Hennman will do in retirement ?

After dinner speaking on the subject of failure

How to release the dormouse within you.

total w***** he should stand for parliament

The Hitch said...

Nemania said

Iain Dale surely you aren’t going to pretend that in addition to not smoking or drinking you have never been to a venue of ill repute .

Mr Mania I think there is much evidence to suggest that Mr Dale is the queen mother of Conservative politics and would never enter such an establishment and that the sight of naked fireman waving his hose about would give him an attack of the vapours. Fr more likely to curl up of an evening with a biography of some obscure 19th century politician

Iain Dale said...

Hitch, how little you know me...

Guthrum said...

Never mind, have a nice cup of tea

ardwick red said...

You sad West Ham muppet.

It's a well deserved relegation for you sorry lot this year while Tevez and United go for the treble.

C4' said...

the Australian Leader of the Opposition has been forced to apologise for going to a New York strip club but can't remember what happened

John Howard is bound to win a five term-in-a-row now.

Julian H said...

"United go for the treble"

Charity Shield, League Cup - what's the third?

Andre said...

Re the EU - it could be worse! you could be living in a country were nowadays euroscepticism is treated like some sort of disease and all political parties seem to worship the EU nowadays.

Newmania said...

Hitch, how little you know me...

Are we still allowed to smirk here or is is it banned ?

BJ said...

The Australian Leader of the Opposition has been forced to apologise for going to a New York strip club but can't remember what happened

There's a new poll out in Australia: Kevin Rudd is said to be disappointed that no-one's dancing round it.

Smith said...

Add to that the killer of Head Teacher Philip Lawrence in 1995 is to be released next year and will not be deported back to Italy, the state he holds a passport for because it breaches his human rights. Another case of a criminals rights being out before the rights of the rest of us.

The Hitch said...

Iain Dale said...

Hitch, how little you know me...

Good gracious
Next thing you will be telling us all is that the Redoubtable Ms Widdecombe accompanies you on jaunts to old compton street and dances the night away to 80's hi energy music fuelled by disco biscuits and GHB.
I think I need to lie down.

Victor, NW Kent said...

Iain - corruption in an African politician is hardly newsworthy. There is little point in being in power in Africa unless it is to get your paw in the honeypot.
Mind you - is that not true in most other countries?

Anonymous said...

Just back from the local pub after luncheon.

I turns out it puts on naked dancing to bring in extra custom.

Today we had the naked fireman, shaking his hose.
The pub was full and I thought I noticed Iain, but isnt he in Zurich?

Anne Widdecombe was buying everyone drinks and said she thought the Fireman was a little too big for her...we had no idea what she meant!

David Cameron stood with his back to the performer saying that he couldn't stand the heat, or something like that.

John Redwood was outside practising with a Welsh Male Voice Choir who were out on a outing! ( with the abuse of english language these days, outing is not, perhaps, the correct word!) But they were singing the Welsh National Anthem.

Gordon Brown was there, in his kilt and sporran,on the front row watching the fireman. Brown was singing Burn baby burn..it turns out he is into hard rock!he was accompanied by Peter Mandleson and other members of the Labour Party Gay Liberation Wing.

Apart from that it was an uneventful lunch.

ranter said...

and this cracking bit of news:

What a silly country we have become!

Another amazing decision!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/london/6955071.stm

The man who knifed head teacher Philip Lawrence to death has been allowed to stay in the UK after winning an appeal against deportation.

Chindamo's lawyers argued that deporting him to Italy, where he was born, would breach his human rights.

marlon's the king said...

would that be Tim Henman, who was the 4th best tennis player in the world? Can you, Dale, say you are the 4th best in the world at anything? Thought not.

The Splund said...

In fairness to Iain his comments re - Henman were reasonable, I thought. He's increasingly injury prone and maybe looking forward to spending more time with his new baby. I didn't feel Iain's comment in any way denigrated his previous achievements.

Tim said...

I'm really enjoying this post that mentions almost everything but this post about Norman Lamb's Facebook profile. Iain continues his pattern of only condemning the use of sock-puppetry and smears when it suits him.

Sir James Beiggelschwarz said...

How about the central bank induced credit squeeze and loan call ins?

Colin D said...

you want some good news? visit Calais and see whats coming our way any and every day? Who Cares???

and finally... said...

This is unfair. I am sure Iain is 4th best at all sorts of things.

Newmania said...

Iain perhaps its time you started sharing your thoughts it being a blog an`all ? i THOUGHT IT WAS A TITLE NOT A STATEMENT OF INTENT

vervet said...

Iain: "... we learn that the government continues to lie to us ..."

Hmm.

Bears / woods
Pope / Catholic

or is it the other way around ?

The Hitch said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
chatterbox said...

"And I Think to Myself, Oh What a Wonderful World, Oh Yeah"

Sorry could not resist it, my favourite song from the late great Louis Armstrong.

Marquee Mark said...

The only thing that gets you through the bad stuff is being able to laugh in the face of adversity. Yes, the story about the paedophile on Viagra is appalling...

But then, he is called Evrard.....!

Tim said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Iain, perhaps you should stop reading The Times!

Sea Shanty Irish said...

#1 -seldom agree with yer politicotheology, Yer Grace, but totally endorse ye when it comes to "irrepressibly joyful" hope!

Check out Iain's ramble through East Anglia w/ Robert Waller - both confessed shocking familiarity with low dives of Thurrock.

Unhealthy SA Health Minister was guy who recently fired leading AIDS campaigner. Reshuffle?

KEVIN RUDD isn't true party boy material. Instead, he got "escorted" by one of Murdock's creatures who set him up (intentionally or not) like a bowling pin. Not very "prime ministerial" but more like Jimmy Carter's "lust in my heart" than Bill Clinton's "zipper problem".

As for good news for CONSERVATIVES top item when I look at BBC New politics webpage is "Cameron Launches Tory Fightback" on NHS.

Also note positive story re: Patrick Mercer MP. While hardly blemish-free, military's record overall is above average in helping make people of UK (and US) more united. Despite blunt, barracks-room remarks, Mercer is a good guy (unlike Borish) who continues to be part of that progress.

On sadder but still hopeful note, thanks Iain for mentioning the trapped CHINESE MINERS who are true brothers to all miners & mining communities . . . and anyone who got anything "made in China" in yer homes, brains & hearts.

And may Commonwealth & Caribbean neighbors (esp. US) give a helping hand to JAMAICA and others hit hard by Hurricane Dean . . .

Steve Horgan said...

Good things do happen all of the time. The trouble is that they are seldom as newsworthy as bad things. And West Ham did win at the weekend.

tapestry said...

What really is wonderful is the consistency with which the Murdoch media continues to attack the government's EUSR policies. This is a sea change.

It seems likely that the USA has at last realised that the EUSR represents a significant danger to its interests and have commandeered Murdoch to show loyalty to US requirements.

It is running a risk for Murdoch to act beyond EUSR approval, but he obviously feels that Brown is not likely to set about him. Is Brown becoming a totally insignificant pawn in continental political powerplay ?

The departure of Blair is the event that freed the US to attack the EUSR, and it's not before time.

Cameron should be feeling most encouraged, and be ready to push out and propose more of the kind of measures which Redwood began with last week.

further than up north said...

Also on the fun side there is a new facebook group:
Nationalists for Wendy Alexander.
Quite a few SNP members seem to think she is the ideal leader for Scottish Labour. They say...

'Labour Party, please elect Wendy Alexander. Some commentators think she's a statistic-drenched policy wonk with no personal skills and all the warmth of a Trebor Extra Strong. We couldn't possibly comment.

She may have twelve degrees and used to earn £80,000 per year as a management consultant (way to connect with the Labour base, Wendy...) but we only really know her for having set back gay rights with her mis-handling of the abolition of Section 2(a). Oh, and her lipstick. Dear god, her lipstick.

But we are assured she is an intellectual powerhouse. Good. The role of the Opposition is to come up with alternative policies. The role of the Government is then to steal the best ones, and we look forward to the SNP Government doing that to a Labour Opposition for a change.

In sum therefore, we simply could not think of a better person to lead the Opposition in Scotland.

Labour members - vote Wendy! (That is, if you are actually trusted with a vote at all. Your leaders know best, I'm sure. After all, they did such a fantastic job with that last election campaign.)
Contact Info Country: Scotland '

achilles said...

At least there is always your blog to find refuge in.....

strapworld said...

Iain,

Orient won also!

What a wonderful life.

Matt W said...

Cheer up Iain.

Go and read the Britblog Roundup - lots of cartoons this week.

If you are still around at 2:30am you could listen to it on Radio 5...

Chris Paul said...

You missed Tony Wilson's funeral in Manchester.

Jamaica got off fairly lightly. The Cayman's too. Stuff happens Iain. Sometimes we hear about it and sometimes we don't. Life goes on. And on balance things are getting better. Really.

On United: the MEN printed the table today WITHOUT the bottom four, placing MU at the foot! And CITY at the top.

Hitch's comments on Henman are a bit silly really. Top ten in the world at any sport - and lawn tennis is not a minority sport - is a little difficult to reconcile with the concept of failure.

Whereas coming second in four consecutive General Elections - well that's what I call failure.

The Hitch said...

Chris paul

Steve coogan on delivering an affectionate tribute to the late Tony Wilson.
whom he played in 24 hour party people

" the biggest twat in manchester playing the second biggest twat"

I think you are number 3 and I am number 4

He was a great ambassador for our beloved home city.

The Hitch said...

PS Chris
He was a Yorkshireman by birth.
Obviously had the good sense to get himself over to the right side of the pennines

PSJ said...

"Whereas coming second in four consecutive General Elections - well that's what I call failure."

Yeah, but they won the next three.

Steven_L said...

On a lighter note Gordon's fantasy bubble, debt-ridden, quagmire of an economic miracle looks like it is about to go tits up.

Tone made me do it - he's a bad influence said...

.....Cameroon saying that he wanted to have a bare knuckle fight to deport Philip Lawrence's murderer.

Yak40 said...

Tone made me do it ..re Lawrence's murderer,

Good, I hope he gets after them, it's the right thing to do and he'll get a lot of support.

Anonymous said...

but he cant be deported due to EU law unless he is a threat. leave the EU now!