Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Off to Dublin to Be Humiliated

I am just off to Dublin to appear in a TV programme called THE PANEL on RTE. From what I can make out it's an Irish version of HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU, albeit with a different and more spontaneous format. There is a host (Colin Murphy) and four comedians, and in each half of the programme they have a different guest. This programme will look back on the Irish elections. One recent guest said this about the show...

It’s a pretty funny show, I sat in the green room being fed peeled fruit by
naked groupies wondering what it would be like to be the least funny person in
the room. Luckily we joined forces and devised an innovative public health
promotion strategy.
Why do I have this feeling of impending doom? If anyone's interested, we record it tonight (for two hours!) and the best 45 minutes are shown at 10.30pm on Wednesday on RTE2.
Have a look at the video of the most recent programme HERE. Pick the 16 May programme as it previewed their elections. They had a real go at Sinn Fein in a way which if a UK broadcaster had done it, they would have been taken to OfCom! Lots of gangster and kneecapping jokes!


UPDATE 12.40am: Well, I survived. Sort of. It will be interesting to see how it's edited, let's put it that way!

18 comments:

  1. Iain, much as I admire your blog, I can't help wondering whether you actually know anything about:
    1. The Irish elections?
    2. Comedy?

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  2. Clive, hence my humiliation concern! Still, I can probably do comedy better than Irish politics ... hopefully... Oh God....

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  3. Just thought I should warn you that they have some of the most restruictive defamation laws in the world. good luck. heheheheh

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  4. I'm sure the experts will be kind to you and won't make mince meat of you (gulp).

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  5. Top o' the mornin' to ya.

    You'll be fine - and too busy crying with laughter at the comic genius of the Irish to worry about being humiliated...as long as you don't act like Basil Fawlty...and don't mention politics :)

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  6. I love the show, it's very funny.

    Jimmy Carr went on before and the panel ripped him apart lol Brace yourself, expect lots of gags about the Tories and British.

    one thing to remember...as an Irishmen, this is my biggest advice to you..

    don't mention "Cromwell"

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  7. Oh well, if all I have to do is be funnier than Jimmy Carr, then that shouldn't be difficult :)

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  8. Funnily enough a mate of mine who is a proud Belfast catholic used to live in Cromwell Avenue and also speaks up for Cromwell's tattered reputation at every opportunity. I'd try bigging up Cromwell Iain ... this will have them on the back foot. He had an enormous organ in the head department. He resisted becoming king when he had the chance. He pissed off the ordinary grafters who had once idolized him. He was a Tory.

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  9. Chris, the Tory party didn;t exist, plus when it finally did ity was Royalist. So basically, you're talking crap.

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  10. Chris Paul said...

    I'd try bigging up Cromwell Iain ... this will have them on the back foot. He had an enormous organ in the head department. He resisted becoming king when he had the chance. He pissed off the ordinary grafters who had once idolized him. He was a Tory.


    Cromwell was the 17th century's Tony Blair.

    He was a nulab spin doctor though and through. A power crazed, war mongering, money mad, violent schizophrenic, who used his putative religion for the most violent persecution of opponents.

    Cromwell sold peerages and was addicted to corrupt freebies.

    Claiming that he was 'just an ordinary, decent sort of bloke', he shut 2000 Irish people in a church and giggled as he watched his troops burn it to the ground.

    'I've knocked the Irish on the head', he wrote home to his wife.

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  11. I really shouldn't of mention Cromwell, should I? :(

    If it makes you feel any better, I do have faith in you Iain. You'll be fine.

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  12. Chris Paul said:

    He resisted becoming king when he had the chance. He pissed off the ordinary grafters who had once idolized him. He was a Tory.


    Chris, the evil wretch declared himself Lord Protector, higher than a monarch - whom he'd had beheaded. He was a sort of quasi- emperor and he stole the luxuries to go with the title.

    Cromwell's reign was the English equivalent of the French Reign of Terror. The compulsive liar who had his own Ministry of truth terrorised everyone, even the rich aristos who financed him - one of whom gave him a golden coach in which he drove around like a maniac.

    Everyone was terrified of Cromwell. His lying, Politically Correct, bogus religious and ideological hegemony made the English afraid to speak a word out of place for fear of violent reprisal.

    His madness, vanity and arrogance lead to him quite literally shooting himself in the bum and he died a miserable old man, tormented by his own evil deeds and his failures. Good riddance.

    Tory? You have to be kidding. He was the original nulab and as Blair as you can get.

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  13. You into all that BDSM stuff too, Iain?

    Never have guessed from your choice of ties...

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  14. bloody 'ell iain, you are a glutton for punishment.

    you are an English Tory after all. they'll rip you to pieces.

    my suggestion - read up on Oscar Wilde one-liners and do it fast!

    ;-)

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  15. oh - and one more thing. dont mention Cromwell.

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  16. Anonymous said...May 29, 2007 1:39 PM


    ...lots of stuff about Cromwell that may very well be true.

    But he did not treat the Irish any worse than was normal in medieval European warfare. The Irish just think they were treated especially badly because they were too ignorant and far away from the continent to know any better. Despite the fact that Irish mercenaries made a living from such warfare. On the other hand, Irish academics at e.g. Dublin University know that perfectly well.

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  17. You didnt do too bad Iain. You survived the onslaught. Love the point you made about SF.

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  18. The Irish just think they were treated especially badly because they were too ignorant and far away from the continent to know any better.

    Thats right Anon.Thats us Irish down to a tee.Good lad. (Throws eyes up to the sky)

    But the English were a little closer to the continent and therefore knew better... that would be the logic eh ?

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