My bank manager has just been on the phone asking if I would like to open a high interest account. It turned out he had read a piece in yesterday's Observer Review section which predicted that my LITTLE BOOK OF BORIS (out next week) may be "the Eats, Shoots and Leaves" of the season.I suppose having written or edited 28 books it's about time I had a bestseller. But I'm not holding my breath. Nor, I suspect, is my bank manager.
Your bank manager rings you up? My God ! How much money have you got stached away ?
ReplyDeleteNice plug, Iain!
ReplyDelete*wink*
Iain. You've not got this, have you? Banks are in the business of generating new business. You open a new account and he gets his bonus. Ask him what it's worth to him personally and then take a commission on his commission...
ReplyDeleteFrankly I got to the point of terminal, almost suicidal, boredom with dealing with my bank manager who was always selling (or trying to sell)something or other to me. Pleasant enough chap, but lunch was always spoiled by me waiting for his pitch and then fending it off.
you have the biggest ego (and forehead) in westminster.
ReplyDeletewell, Northern Rock need all the business they can get.
ReplyDeleteWhy is it that the leading Google Ad on the Politico's page for this book is for books about Freemasonery ? I think we should be told.
ReplyDeleteHow can you do a LITTLE book when you've got so damn much material???
ReplyDeleteif your bank manager calls you, it means that he needs you more than you need him. Your debts must be stratospheric. northern rock client?
ReplyDeleteWell done Iain. 28 Books? You've kept that very quiet. But an unexpurgated and unauthorized version must surely follow?
ReplyDeleteYou know, one with the bits the public will assume are going to be found within ...
You actually have a "bank manager"?
ReplyDeleteAll I can through to these days is a shoulder-padded woman selling "financial products" while attending like a wet-nurse to a laptop computer.
Surely it is Boris who should be getting the royalties? Any damn fool can do a scissors-and-paste job, but it takes genius to utter the obiter dicta in the first place!
ReplyDeleteClothilde Simon
Do't believe a word they tell you Iain. I've worked on and off in sales for 10 years, it's a bigger scam than politics. If you came to me for financial advice I'd slam you with whatever my boss wanted me to slam you with and was going to pay me the most for slamming you with.
ReplyDeleteMy solicitor, not content with about 5 hours work haggling over and out of court settlement @ £179/hour, is now trying to sell me financial advice from one of her mates. I don't need it, I know how to gamble and I have the internet to tell me who the best fund managers are if I want someone to gamble for me.
She wants to recommend someone I can pay to recommend a unit trust that I pay into, to pay him for recommending it, or something like that.
Bank managers, solicitors, etc, they are all charlitans, quit while you are ahead and buy a nice Audi.
If the Boris book is going to sell that well why not cancel the A5 and get an RS4 you big girls blouse.
Sooner or later MTM will probably be able to get it blown for you too!