It's time for all chipmunks to come off the wheel fence and give their backing to the only credible candidate for the Labour leadership. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Hazel Blears. As Tom Watson MP says (for it must be true) "I would say that this is a very serious bid indeed, that easily eclipses many of the other campaigns so far." She has a super WEBSITE, a profile on Facebook (but only 26 members!), MySpace and Flickr and even announced her candidacy on Youtube. Sadly, despite Dizzy's best efforts, this spectacular video has only been seen by 24 people so far, so I urge all my blog readers to watch it and support Hazel. You know it makes sense.
And we can help her in another way. I don't think her campaign slogan quite works: HAZEL FOR DEPUTY - WINNING FOR LABOUR. Well, it just doesn't make me moist with excitement. And you, dear readers, can do better. I know you can.
Iain, anyone who can say that John Prescott had been a brilliant deputy Leader without choking is fatally flawed.
ReplyDeleteLet's see...
ReplyDelete(1)No more tears with Hazel Blears.
(2)Three cheers for Hazel Blears.
(3)She's not all that she appears .. Hazel Blears.
(4)Break new frontiers with Hazel Blears.
And my personal favourite for the feminist's vote...
(5)Burn your brassieres for Hazel Blears.
I have a sneaking regard for Hazel Blears. When I asked her why the life of an English cancer patient is worth less than that of a Scottish cancer patient, Hazel answered along the lines of, 'I don't know'.
ReplyDeleteShe hasn't flinched from putting other, highly critical reponses on her blog either.
However, Hazel has remained part of this rotten government. She has not resigned in protest at the erosion of our civil liberties and our services in England. Nor has she stood up against the many injustices the people of England have to stomach on a daily basis. And, tellingly, she hasn't screamed blue murder against the huge salaries, pay increases and tax free pensions that nulab have awarded politicans.
So, sorry Hazel, but along with the rest of the nulabbers, goverment wise, you're goner come the election.
Maybe you need to re-shuffle Doughty Street so that you film people in the kitchen making a cup of tea, or having a cup of coffee and a choccie biscuit, and using the studio as the 'Green Room' - Absolutely priceless!
ReplyDeleteI hold no brief for Hazel Blears as a politician but any girl that has hair that red is just a little bit foxy..
"Avoid the tears" VOTE BLEARS
ReplyDeleteYep, I've joined Blears for Deputy on facebook. In my recent poll where I asked who would make the best Deputy (from the Tory perspective) Hazel walked it.
ReplyDeleteCopy Hazel and "Inject" a smile into your life.
ReplyDeleteStand tall with Hazel.
ReplyDeleteComplete cloud cuckoo land.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice that she shows us where all our taxes have gone - up North.
Shouldn't we be concentrating on decided who the Euro-Fuhrer is to be?
ReplyDeleteAs a Labour supporting Addick living in Kent - have come to both your blogs to get you up to date comments on yesterday's match - for once you appear to have been silenced. Looks like both your footbal and politics will soon be conducted in the 2nd Division (or whatever it is called nowadays).
ReplyDeletePS I expect your support for poor Hazel will also be the kiss of death!
Anyway, looks like she's already got Dorneywood, so why would she want two?
ReplyDeleteHow monumentally pathetic was that performance?
ReplyDeleteI will have to read it later as the speed of delivery didnt allow me to shout "you silly c**t' and hear the start of the next sentence.
I thought she did get one message accross that should resonate with voters "I want to build on the success of the last 10 years"
I would not allow someone of that standard to mow my lawn. I hope all those cheering supporters in Salford were served with ASBO- i personally found them very offensive.
How can Bliar worry about his legacy when his govt is made up of utter fuckwits like her, jowell, hewitt and Beckett?
that old Smokey Robinson number...
ReplyDeleteBlears of a Clown
campaign poster with Blears on a lead and Tony handing it to Gordo dressed as John Reid
She's a politician's politician if ever there was one, she's good at what she does (staying on message against all logical argument) but should she run the country while Gordie's away?
ReplyDeleteWhat is that appliance next to the toaster? I think I may need one.
ReplyDeleteWhat a team Hazel & Ian McCartney would have made!
ReplyDeleteA red top wot will win it for Labour
ReplyDeleteWhere there are fears there should be Blears.....
Five more years with Hazel Blears
This is better
Save your carreers support Hazel Blears.
That should appeal to the cynical scum bag Labour Party
Anon 4.02 What a great idea!Could herald the return of limbo dancing as a sport.
ReplyDeleteHazel & Ian limbo dancing-fantastic idea.They'd walk it!
ReplyDelete"Hazel Blears- Who gives a flying fuck anymore, anyway?"
ReplyDeleteWorks for me.
I think Guido has it spot on when he compares her to Comical Ali. She claims that everything is fine and nothing is going wrong for the government even when its own supporters accept that there are problems. She should be forced to explain why she is such a liar.
ReplyDeleteClearly you've provided the slogan yourself - "Hazel Blears - she makes Iain Dale moist"
ReplyDeleteI've just poked her on facebook, ooo-er
ReplyDeleteVote diminutive chipmunk! (ignore Tom Watson though Hazel, he has something of the night about him)
ReplyDeleteDon't tell me there's a real person called Hazel Blears? I've seen her on TV and thought she was a robot, programmed to parrot certain phrases no matter what the question. Deputy Leader? You're having a laugh!
ReplyDeleteI hear she's stolen a pollster from the Labour party in Scotland.
ReplyDeleteIn Blear's defence, if she is the post-Blair "aspirational Labour" candidate then I would support her despite her grubby posturing on so many issues.
ReplyDeleteWhat this country certainly doesn't need is a Hainite attack on the middle class.
Once you've gone ginger there's no going back!
ReplyDeleteOpposition for Years
ReplyDeleteWith Hazel Blears.
"There's Only Tears with Hazel Blears"
ReplyDelete"Let's say Cheers to Hazel Blears",
"Only Leers for Hazel Blears"
"Have a Beer with Hazel Blears"
....Oh fuck it, none of it works!
If she really believed all the things she talked about in her video she should stand for leader, not deputy.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that she hasn't suggests that she is afraid of that sour vengeful McGordon McBrown, just like everyone else. Plus of course she's not from Scotland.
She should stick to her day job as the short half of the Crankies.
ReplyDeleteDo we really want a Girl Guide as deputy leader of not just the Labour Party but of this country?
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm not even sure it is Hazel Blears in the video on Dizzy's site. I think it's Catherine Tate pretending to be HB. You listen to their speech patterns....
Hazel: "We must build on our success" - I assume there was no irony there - "and make politics matter." Gosh, Haze, old bean, all my life, I hadn't realised politics mattered until you pointed it out!
ReplyDeleteHave you been declared legally brain dead yet?
Hahaha, check out this comment from a Hazel fan on Facebook:
ReplyDelete"as a tory you can go F@*k yourself. Gordon Brown and Hazel Blears have far more appeal than all the stuck up toffs on the tory front bench."
Not if the latest opinion poll is anything to go by! And while I accept Brown probably has some popular appeal I find it hard to believe Blears does, especially with her laughable attempts to defend everything New Labour does and has done.
I never thought I'd be able to say that Benn is the most sensible candidate for Deputy Leadership.
ReplyDeleteI used to think "Blears" was just a dyslexic spelling of Blair. But I suppose it might be comforting to those who'll miss the B L A R. Those high ceilings at Dorneywood would be wasted though, and they'd be the expense of buying a cut down croquet mallet.
Seriously, she's a total lightweight. Surely the one thing that Brown really does need is someone prepared to stand up to him when necessary. Blears absolutely won't.
It really does not matter because She ant going to win and if she does she is a political castrati and will not be in the job for long.
ReplyDeleteThe Tories are on the march. When opinion polls give a consistant Tory lead for a year which they now have its over for New Labour. They would also have to be insane not to believe so.
We will get our vote out Labour will not, its as simple as that.
"Hazel - full of creamy goodness"*
ReplyDelete*Hazel Blears promises not to abuse her position as Party Chair to access your party membership records and contact you during the deputy leadership election; nor will she use Party communications to portray herself in a positive light to the detriment of other candidates. No, honestly.
Is she for really?
ReplyDeleteOr does being in NuLabor make you more susceptible to CJD?
As most of the more prominient NuLabor tosspots are exhibiting symptons of mental illness.
"Endure a stream of rancid disingenuous political clap-trap with Hazel Blears" doesn't quite have that snappy ring to it...
ReplyDelete"Hazel Blears - taking BS to the next level."?
"Hazel Blears - such a convincing fraud, she may even believe it herself"
I just want to say I have NO sneaking regard for Hazel Blears. Compare her to a liar and you would not get a cigarette paper between them. Utterly contemptable in all aspects. I consider her a vile, obnoxious, poisonous, wicked, venal, twisting lowlife without one ounce of integrity.
When I get off the fence, I will let you know my verdict.
She should stick to her day job as the short half of the Crankies.
ReplyDeletePerfect fit for Gordon, then.
Given the increasingly presidential charcater of politics and the need to humanise robotic candidates, how about one of these for a slogan:
ReplyDeleteHAZEL: you'd be nuts not to
HAZEL: it takes a nut to lead the fruitcakes
HAZEL: political Duracell
None of the above are actually true, which makes them perfect as slogans.