Sunday, January 29, 2006

The Delusions of a West Ham Fan


Having witnessed West Ham's 4-2 drubbing of Blackburn yesterday (what a shame Jack Straw was in Davos...) I dreamt last night that the Hammers reached the FA Cup final and became the first team to play at the New Wembley. It would be fitting for them to do so as they were also the first team to play at the Old Wembley in 1923 when they played Bolton Wanderers in the famous White Horse final. And we all know that the God of football likes coincidences. Imagine the paroxysms it would send John Motson into. "Well yes indeed Gary, the omens are good for West Ham, in 1923 they had a white horse, in 2006 they've got a manager with white hair. The Hamas won an election in Palestine this year, will the Hammers be lucky in the Cup? Gary, they'll be cheering on the streets of Teddy Sheringham on a Christian Dailly basis if the Hammers triumph today. Back to the studio." Sorry, I got a bit carried away there...

But there are other omens...

1. When the Hammers won the Cup in 1975 Alan Taylor scored 6 goals. West Ham's current manager is called Alan.
2. When West Ham won the Cup in 1980 they beat Ipswich along the way. This year they've beaten their East Anglian rivals Norwich.

Desperate? Moi? I'm sure in the end realti will dawn in the line from I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles which reads, "just like my dreams, they fade and die". As a West Ham fan, I'm used to it.

UPDATE 4.15pm: Bloody hell! I've just seen pictures on SKY NEWS of two planes which apparently nearly collided directly above Upton Park while West Ham were playing yesterday! The CAA say it wasn't a near miss, but if you see the pictures, you decide! Looks bloody close to me!

3 comments:

  1. Who knows, it could even be a Bolton v West Ham final

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shouldn't it be one of the first teams to play at New Wembley, given that it'd be hard to have a cup final with just one side? Though my pessimistic Hammers-supporting flatmate would probably say that you could contrive to lose a game in which you were the only team playing...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Pah. And this, the revelatory new Wembley year, was meant to open with Cup Kings Tottenham (TM) reclaiming their rightful role. Preferably with legendary Glenn and/or Teddy leading the way out of the tunnel. But alas, not to be, and would be even more galling if no-longer-so-sweet Sheri finally decided his boyhood heroes weren't in fact Spurs/Millwall/Man United/delete-as-appropriate, but your enjoyable lot... ;)
    Am still enough of a fan (of his, not West Ham, mind) to defiantly fend off the rumours that not only is he one of the staunchest of Tories but that he, er, struggles to read and write, for all his 'intelligent footballer' image rights...
    Say it ain't so, Ted...
    Good luck in the next round. Especially if you draw Chelsea!

    ReplyDelete