A very funny take on 2005 in today's EDP. Below are some selected highlights, which concentrate on Norman Lamb's knee jerk reaction to any crisis - select one of three... 1. Table an EDM. 2. Brand it a "disgrace". 3. Write to the Minister. Funny that nothing else ever seems to happen. But we mustn't start the New Year off in such a begrudging way. It is after all the season of good will to all men... For the unexpurgated version CLCIK HERE.
FEBRUARY
Panic is averted as Norfolk County Council manages to reduce a proposed council tax increase from 56.7pc to 4.6pc. “Painful” cuts include the abolition of nasal hair plucking allowances for chief officers and the end of six-week “fact-finding” trips to Martinique for senior councillors. A footnote to a County Hall press release – visible only under a microscope – mentions that all the county's libraries, museums and care homes will also be closed. Norwich North MP Dr Ian Gibson calls it a “disgrace”. North Norfolk MP Norman Lamb pledges to table an Early Day Motion and write to John Prescott.
The EDP We Care Appeal's bid for £5000 from the Big Lottery is rejected and branded “too much”.
MARCH
Tragedy strikes at the Norfolk and Norwich University Hospital when two patients fall into the £30m black hole. Norman Lamb and Ian Gibson vow to “look into it”. Hospital bosses want to act before other patients are injured, but say the private finance (PFI) deal does not include a hole-plugging clause.
The EDP We Care Appeal's bid for £500 from the Big Lottery to pay for one holiday for one child carer is rejected for being “an unworthy cause”.
APRIL
The PFI deal collapses. Bob the Builder pulls out after refusing to answer the question “can you fix it?” Ian Gibson and Norman Lamb brand it a “disgrace”. Mr Lamb tables an Early Day Motion.
The entire Norfolk Green Party is made the subject of an antisocial behaviour order (Asbo) by magistrates for writing too many letters to the EDP.
The EDP We Care Appeal's bid for £50 for some envelopes is rejected as “too ambitious”.
But Iain the EDP thinks N Lamb will still be MP in July
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Alistair Darling announces that all dualling schemes for Norfolk are to be “indefinitely postponed”. Within days he is treated for minor paper cuts as he is engulfed in a sea of angry letters from Norfolk. Ian Gibson calls it a “disgrace”. North Norfolk MP Norman Lamb pledges to table an Early Day Motion""""
I am sure this was written with the same sense of deep irony as the rest of the article!
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