Saturday, September 19, 2009

Advice to Political Agents: Part 94

A friend of mine has just bought a book, published in 1935, entitled "Rules and Conduct for Agents in a Parliamentary Election Campaign". The opening chapter includes the following priceless advice:

"A Candidates' Agent should ensure that motor cars are available to transport voters to and from the place of poll. This is particularly important in rural constituencies which contain high numbers of farmers, crofters, woodsmen, countryfolk and the physically lame. It is advisable that a flatbed truck is procured onto which even the most severely crippled can be hoisted and transported to the voting place."


Invaluable. Flatbed trucks at the ready please!

20 comments:

  1. I'll have no truck with such outdated methods! :-)

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  2. Who wrote it???????????????????

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  3. The Conservatives must purchase a fleet of flatbed trucks. They will prove invaluable for transporting the gibbets with which to string up senior Labour Party figures after the next General Election. Alternatively the trucks could be used to transport lampposts to areas of greatest need, in which case adequate supplies of piano wire will also be required.

    Off topic: isn't Clegg a great big con? Would you buy a secondhand promise of electoral reform from this man?

    WV: smelipoo. You couldn't make it up.

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  4. Wonderful - are we a better nation now that we cannot use words like 'severely crippled'

    Except of course in the context of 'Gordon Brown as severely crippled the economy'.

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  5. Brilliant!

    Just seen Clegg's speech - what a plank, and his audience didn't seem to keen either.

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  6. Careful, the Council will set the Health and Safety Nazis on you

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  7. The alternative being introducing postal voting and then getting the agent to fill them in on behalf of the voters...

    Or has someone already thought of that one?

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  8. Cheerful Charlie was on earlier, looking very glum; living proof of the simple truth that being sober is not as much fun as being drunk. He averred that when he was Leader he'd have given his left leg to be at 19 per cent in the opinion polls. As distinct from his liver, presumably.

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  9. That's still in the 2009 version isn't it?

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  10. I went to pick up a Lib Dem voter and take her to the polling station in Cromer (North Norfolk) a few years ago. When i got there she told me she didn't need a lift and there had been a mistake as the Tories always take her to the polling station.
    "Aren't you a Lib Dem ?" I enquired.
    "Oh, the Tories have driven me to the polling station every election since 1945", she explained "and I've never once voted for them yet !"

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  11. Cleggy has taken his tye off-this could mean trouble!!!

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  12. Sounds a bit like the Welsh Ambulance Service.

    http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/health-news/2009/08/29/woman-s-3-hour-ambulance-wait-91466-24559255/

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  13. Ahhh! Those were the days! I remember campaigning in Quebec, in the 1970s, when the candidate (a minister and future prime minister) opened up the boot at a political rally and handed out beer for everyone, while I poured sherry for the ladies.

    Then another time where the candidate and I searched for 1st, 2nd, 3rd etc Avenues for a whole day. Only to find that local conservatives had been voting the dead on 1st, 2nd, 3rd Avenues of the local cemetary!

    We don't run campaigns like the good old days.

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  14. I think that advice must have been for Norfolk.

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  15. I think you'll find this grand tradition was continued by John Prescott on the campaign trail.

    Mind you, he did tend to lie in the back himself.

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  16. A candidate handing our beer and sherry? Expect that in Labour marginals: on expenses of course.

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  17. At least arrangements were made, in 1935, to get as many people to vote as possible.

    Postal votes did not exist and until we can find a totally secure way for postal votes, we should return to the ballot box for all.

    Instead of laughing at this, one should study the book. There is much good advice contained within its pages.

    It treated people with respect. Sadly a word that is hardly considered these days.

    I know of this book as my father was a conservative party agent in the 50/60's
    and he had a copy of this very book, which I read.

    I do recall that he attended courses in Swinton for agents!

    Thanks for bringing back nice memories Iain.

    If people want a refreshing programme to watch. May I recommend Hard Talk on BBC News where Andrew Neil does a perfect Zorro job on that great economic seer Dr. Vincent Cable..absolutely brilliant!

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  18. "Wonderful - are we a better nation now that we cannot use words like 'severely crippled'

    Except of course in the context of 'Gordon Brown as severely crippled the economy'."


    Heh!

    But no, a serious point. Amazingly, changing the wording to 'disabled', then to 'differently abled', then to 'persion with a (fill in the blank)' has made absolutely no difference at all in their ability to walk/see/hear, etc.

    And before everyone rushes to say 'what about the provision of ramps/slopes/handrails', the nomenclature had nothing to do with that whatsoever.

    It hasn't changed people's attitudes, either (an oft-quoted goal of the movement).

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  19. Look , here in the rural areas , we provide GPS for the elderlies motorised transporters- pre programmed for the location of the polling stations!

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