Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Self Abuse

Will Self writes in today's Evening Standard...
I find the pictures of the Camerons walking hand in hand while on holiday in Cornwall almost pathologically disturbing.

Really. A wholly inappropriate use of the word 'pathologically' I would have thought. This, from someone who is feted by leftie intellectuals as of the great writers of our age (no, don't laugh). Do you know what I find almost pathologically disturbing? People who take hard drugs while on a plane with the Prime Minister.

Now, where did I put that saucer of milk?

46 comments:

  1. He is a prat I grant you, but he is right about Dave and the wife. Pathetic.

    Nauseating would have been a more appropriate adjective.

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  2. Iain - don't take the bait from this condescending turdbag - I took great exception to some comment he made about 'provincial types' with his sneery metropolitan wankery on Radio 4's 'Saturday Live' with Fi I'm too good for Radio 5 now Glover, but then I just realised I'd fallen into his elephant trap..

    He's called Will Self for a reason - he likes the sound of his own voice.

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  3. Meow...

    But seriously, dear will is funny, but barking.

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  4. Iain ! You got a rise out of me there, thinking this was going to be a posting about masturbation...

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  5. I suppose David Cameron has to do this sort of thing because he has virtually nothing to say on policy. What does he really stand for? And half the population agree.

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  6. What I find disturbing is the OTT reaction of any Conservative at anyone daring to criticise a fellow Tory - whether it's DC playing frisbee on the beach or John Redwood putting some Thatcherite idea before the public (deregulation of mortgages anyone).

    And yes I am a Tory myself but I don't like this defensiveness.

    I imagine the right-wing media & bloggers will not in this spirit refrain from laying into pics of Brown strolling through Southwold.

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  7. Does anyone care what that junkie says or writes?

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  8. Iain,

    He is allowed to express his opinion, in the same way that you have exercised yours.

    Why are you so bovvered that he took drugs on the PM's plane? At least he tried to do it in private - even if it massively backfired.

    For someone who is forward thinking, you can be very narrowminded sometimes!

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  9. You're jealous of him

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  10. Why does anyone take anything that Self writes or says seriously? I've always regarded him as one of Britain's great comedians. A man of enormous talent. His every utterance has me in stitches.

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  11. If you want a good laugh (and getaway from the stupid provocations of Will Self) take a look at this must see German doc about Glasgae Ost:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=I4n--IXg6HY

    Very very funny.
    (hat-tips: 45govt, Mrs Trellis and Fluffy Thoughts)

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  12. Is 'Self Abuse' ad hominem?

    Dizzy, please advise.

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  13. Will Self. I'll bet he does

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  14. But if ou read the whole, short item, it's clear he's making a joke, the burden of which is that an uxorious PM can't be expected to pay proper attention to the country. Laboured and not hugely fnny, but a joke.

    He's also making the entirely fair point that Cameron looks a prick in his horrible Boden catalogue clothes.

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  15. Iain,

    Whilst I could never condone the use of Class A drugs, I think that if someone found themselves on a plane with the current Prime Minister....

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  16. Much as I hate to agree with Self he is right.These spontaneous shots outsicked Blair at his self promoting worst.

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  17. But Iain, HE is pathologically disturbed.

    Alan Douglas

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  18. Will Self is a complete tosser who indulges in mental masturbation which, bizzarely, idiots pay money to read and listen to....hmmm.

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  19. Milliband D has made the first move in the war of Gordon's head over on Comment is Free.

    The CiF responses are satisfyingly abusive.....

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  20. Clearly Will Self hasn't seen this photo:

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00375/gg385_375144a.jpg

    Yeah, he's just chillin' with his crew!

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  21. They probably made an agreement with the press for a photo opportunity so they would be left alone afterwards.

    When I saw the pictures of the Browns and Camerons side by side in the paper, my thought was that I could imagine Brown having a team of advisers who persuaded him to leave his tie off and wear a light coloured jacket whereas the Camerons quite likely just went out in what they were going to wear anyway.

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  22. "David from Ealing said ...
    I suppose David Cameron has to do this sort of thing because he has virtually nothing to say on policy"

    Well, not once witless Labour has stolen them all, and then implemented them very badly, no, I don't suppose he has.

    Alan Douglas

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  23. Iain, who was that complete arse on the paper review with you? His Karadzic skit was one of the most woeful things I've ever heard.

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  24. Steve Norris when asked who his favourite author was by the Evening Standard in 2004: "Will Self. I think he's great."

    Please don't assert that lefties rate him without linking to any evidence.

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  25. Sorry, I know this isn't the right place for this comment, but don't know where else to say it....but hey Iain, that was the best Sky News paper review I have ever seen. Must have been a bit tricky dealing with your co-reviewer!!! But it was great. Well done.

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  26. May I say that the paper review,on Sky, was extremely entertaining and very humourous. I didn't get the other man's name but he was very quick witted.

    His hearing aids were superb! I hope you get him to write for your magazine.

    Well done. Great chemistry

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  27. Shut your gob, Will Self, those photos of David and Sam Cameron are lovely...and don't you just know that, if the truth be told?

    I can understand why a crony of Brown's would be green with envy when comparing the decidedly frigid, unrelaxed and buttoned up photos of Brown and Sarah with the relaxed photos of the Camerons.

    The Browns appear to be miserable as sin at the English seaside. England's not good enough for the Broonies, eh, because it's not Scotland, not their ane land and not sufficiently upmarket?

    It'd all too clear that the Browns detest having to do their political duty by holidaying in England. I bet they can't wait to rush away asap on their real hols in Scotland.

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  28. Thankyou Iain Dale . Will Self has been a royal pain in the arse for years and he is a deeply mediocre writer.

    I agree with Flo , loved the Cameron pictures , yes we know its posed but he takes the trouble to look human. I was on the same beach looking much the same last Summer and his wife is fantastic.

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  29. Will Self... that's sure one chicken I'd like to strangle.

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  30. "Does anyone care what that junkie says or writes?"

    That's not a nice thing to say about Iain!!! ;-)

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  31. Iain, sometimes you are just so square...

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  32. What does "yinappropriate" mean?

    Is there a wider issue here about the demands on modern columnists being so great that they end up producing complete bollocks?

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  33. I thought that picture of the Camerons on the front page of the Telegraph was pure gold. Mrs C rarely takes a bad photo, and they looked like a genuinely happy couple (which seems to be the case).

    It is unfortunately true that Mrs B always looks slightly frumpy and ill-at-ease.

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  34. To be honest, he was in the company of John Major, another well known hypocrite.

    Back to Basics while shafting Edwina Currie.

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  35. Isn't is actually a wholly appropriate use of the word "pathologically" - which I always thought meant a product of a mental disorder?

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  36. I have every sympathy with him. These obviously contrived shots, with setting, clothing and pose agonised over by the Party image spinners just underline what a cynical exercise the business of trying to fool enough of the people some of the time can be.

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  37. The best thing to come out of this is the phrase coined by Anon @ 9.09 PM: 'Sneery metropolitan wankery'.
    Perfect!

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  38. The physically repulsive dislikeable Will Self is just jealous of the attractive charismatc likeable Cameron. Self would like to be a successful author but unfortunately his writing is as unattractive as his character so his books will never sell. I can only imagine the Evening Standard employ him as an act of charity so he can bore us with the minutiae of his very pedestrian life and his half a dozen endlessly repeated malicious opinions.

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  39. My Idea of Fun is a great and disturbing read. Great Apes and Cock & Bull just disturbing. But yes, the man is a pretentious twat.

    (the day after I commented you never have guest writers, you had a guest writer. I feel like Chris Paul.)

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  40. Well said Auntie Flo:
    Yes 'Shut yer gob Will Self!

    Didn't hear him complaining when Cherie and Tony were dribbling all over each other and giving us lurid details about their sex life; i.e. Sex with '5 times a night Tony', 'conceiving Leo at Balmoral'. Yuk how low class is that?
    'Dontcha' just love these wealth and priviledge envying Champagne Socialists.....Sados' all of them.

    So just Shut up Will Self 'abuse'.

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  41. All part of the Socialist loathing of the family. The State has to hold our hands, remember, and no one else!

    BTW catch the book review on R4 (I forget the name). They reviewed Huxley's Brave New World. Amazing that there was a brief jab at our control freak government but then no exploration of the fact that Huxley wrote it due to his dislike/fear of Socialism. The Luvvies are in denial - Huxley was right.

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  42. Newmania - delightfully ambiguous comment. But accurate in that Will Self is 'deeply mediocre'.

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  43. Talking about Edwina-have you read her piece in the DM today? A MUST!

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  44. I was also on the plane, which was bound for Teesside for a photo-op between Major and Margaret Thatcher at the site of her 1986 "walk in the wilderness."

    When Self was challenged by the in-flight security guards about his frequent trips to the lavatory, he replied that he had "a rather unfortunate habit." Presumably they thought he meant wanking rather than taking smack, or else they would surely have arrested him for posession of a class A drug.

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  45. Personally, the thought of accidentally brushing against Will self, let alone holding hands etc., is enough to be a time to go and talk to God on the great white phone... ('Ohhhhh, Godddddddddddd!!!!!!!!!!! Blaghhhhhhh!!!!')

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